Love at First Sight || d.w

The City Lights

Dallon's POV

In high school I did things like stay out way too late at parties with my friends where I would drink, smoke, and do drugs. All where foolish decisions because I had nothing else to channel any of my emotions into. All of the sadness of my dad moving out had eventually turned into hatred and rage. What better way to fix that than completely ignoring it. Get your mind off of it.

But then they started bringing instruments and suggesting these bands to me. And the songs they and songs these bands I've never heard of before played had meaning. The words made me feel something inside. Something rather than anger and total sadness. I was happy when the music was playing.

My girlfriend at the time, Kate, got me my first bass, a scratchy red Vintage Modified Jaguar.  She definitely got it at a yard sale, but it held up well and got the job done, so I can't complain.

And then I got into the music scene. I didn't stop drinking and smoking immediately and I never stopped going to parties, but I focused on my music more. I don't think there was ever a day that went by that I didn't pick up that bass. I wrote a few songs, too, but I never liked any of them. I rewrote them a few years after, now they just sit in a notebook in a box somewhere.

It didn't surprise me any that my family didn't realize where I was or what I was doing though, they were all dealing with their own grief. And who wants to deal with the kid with the fucked up mind who can't last a day acting "normal" and "okay". It doesn't help that I made a point to never be home, leave super early and come home super late. Part of it was I felt like no one really cared about me, no one asked what I was feeling. If I was okay, what I wanted. The other part was it all seemed like bad vibes in the house. Everyone acted normal as if nothing had changed, but I wasn't oblivious to the scars on my brothers wrist and the drugs in my mothers system. 

All my dad did was move out, and we were destroyed. I was destroyed...

*****

"Sarah said that Mer's flight got delayed," Brendon says looking at his phone screen.  Merideth and Sarah were flying into San Francisco today, but not together. By the time I had convinced her to come to the string of shows in California Sarah's flight was out of seats.

"What for? It's sunny in LA," Spencer adds from his spot in the middle of the floor.

"Something to do with the plane. Hole in the gas tank or something. She's not sure."

"That sucks," I say. It's really not that bad of a situation. Right when Sarah's flight lands we'll be starting sound check and right when Merideth's flight would have landed we would be starting meet and greats. We won't be missing any time seeing each other. Though, even if we wouldn't be seeing each other, knowing she's in the same city as me is comforting. "Speaking of," I say picking up my phone for Mer's call. "Hey, I heard your flight got delayed."

"Yeah, the idiot who fills the gas tank just so happened to do something that was clearly stupid so there's a hole in the tank. They're working on fixing it right now. But, they said it could take hours so I might not be in San Francisco in time for the show."

"Oh. Oh, that's okay. There's always the next show. And I'll see you tonight, it's not your fault."

"No, it's not okay. If I had stopped being stubborn and just agreed to come when you first asked then I would be on that flight with Sarah that lands in twenty minutes." Okay, but that's true. "One moment, they have an update."

I shouldn't be upset that she might miss the show, there's plenty of other chances for her to see me play live. But tonight was suppose to be special.