When Will You Learn?

Chapter 4

2 a.m.- I still don't like saying dear diary but I need something. I guess I'll say hey journal because the thought of me writing into a "diary" makes it seem like I'm 12. Hey journal, it's 2 in the morning and I woke abruptly because my mother's heart monitor was going off like crazy. I had to call a nurse in and now my mother has been in surgery for the past hour and no one is telling me what the hell is going on. I'm squirming like crazy in this seat because all I can think of is this stupid Ben person. What if he was an ass? What if I was the only one who thought he was decent?

I was suddenly approached by a doctor, so I out my journal down on the side table.

"So, Allie, I need to ask you a question"

"Okay?"

"I know this might be hard to answer, but i need to know. Has your mother been seeing multiple guys?"

What the hell? Who does this guy think he is?

"Uh, I have no clue. But that's very personal and that was unprofessional of you. Why do you ask?"

"Well, your mother has cervical cancer and the main diagnosis is HPV. Do you know what that is?"

"Um, no" 

I gave him a puzzled look.

"So, HPV is Human Papillomavirus. It can be transmitted through sexual contact, so that's why I asked?"

"Well, what can I or we do to get rid of it? And how did you not catch this before? It's pretty extreme."

"Well, Allie.."

He put his hand on my shoulder.

"Get off of me." I said as I pushed him off me.

"Allie, HPV is a virus, so she will have to live with it forever. It's similar to HIV. Of course there is medicine that can treat the symptoms. But it seems like she has this for a while. Years maybe. Has she ever said anything about severe itching or warts anywhere?"

Oh my gosh. The party. The rape. The abortion. It all makes sense now.

"So, a while ago,when she was in high school, my mother was, raped. She had to get an abortion and everything. But that's most likely where she got HPV."

"I'm so sorry to hear that. We'll get her some medicine right away."

It's always hard to talk about my mother being raped. No one wants to hear of such atrocious things. It's hard for me to talk about it and it didn't even happen to me. Imagine if a complete drunken stranger took something that you could never replace? And gave you the horror of feeling empty and brokenhearted? Not to mention the time, money, an dreadfulness of an abortion? It's quite sad.