3. How Do We Handle This?

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*Taylor's POV*

When we return from the doctor's office, Adam wakes Ellie from her slumber and carries her inside, while I follow behind them.

As soon as we get in the door, we're greeted by an unusually soothing silence.

Karlie was watching the boys, and I was a little nervous, because her and Joshua had just had their first baby, and I worried that my boys would be too much work for her.

I make my way towards the kitchen, where I see Noah eating lunch peacefully at the table, while Karlie is standing near the refrigerator holding Luke, trying to bribe him with a cookie.

I smile to myself when I see that Karlie's baby girl Stella is awake in her carrier, which is resting on the countertop.

"Hi, guys!", I say, lifting Stella out of the carrier, and holding her to my chest.

I breathe in the scent of baby shampoo and talcum powder, and it transports me to another universe for a split second.

Karlie had asked me to be Stella's godmother, and of course I was ecstatic.

"Hey Tay, how did it go?", Karlie asks cheerfully, as she smiles down at her 2 month old daughter in my arms.

"We'll talk later", I say, and she nods understandingly.

As soon as Luke sees me holding Stella, he starts squirming and wriggles out of Karlie's arms.

"MAMA UP", he wails, trying to get my attention so I would lift him into my arms.

"Just a second, baby", I say, looking down into Stella's green eyes, just as Ellie finally makes an appearance and runs to give Karlie a hug.

"How is my Goddaughter feeling?",Karlie asks, as she strokes the top of Ellie's head.

"Much better, Kar Kar", she mumbles.

"I MAMA'S BABY", Luke screams, tugging on my leg.

I sigh and hand a smiley Stella to Karlie, and lift Luke into my arms.

"What's going on with you, bud?", I ask, as he nuzzles his head into my chest.

"I Mommy's baba", he says quietly, and I kiss the top of his head, inhaling his scent.

"Did you just want cuddles with your Momma?", I coo, rocking him back and forth.

I look over at Noah, who is unusually quiet. Adam has sat down next to him at the table, but he isn't saying much.

"Hey big boy", I say to him, walking over and bending down to give Noah a kiss.

"Hi, Mommy", he whispers, bringing his attention back to Adam almost immediately.

Luke leans slightly out of my arms and pats Noah on the head, but he gets no response.

I shake it off, and walk back over to Karlie, who is carefully watching as Ellie holds Stella properly for the first time.

"Be careful with her head Ellie. Is she too heavy for you sweetie?", I ask nervously as Ellie holds the baby, clearly mesmerised by the whole experience.

"She's fine Tay, I'm watching them", Karlie says, squeezing my shoulder, as I put Luke down.

"Mommy?", Ellie says quietly, as she finally hands Stella back to Karlie, which calms my nerves.

"Mmm Hmm?", I mumble, pulling her in for a hug.

"How come I have two brothers and zero sisters?", she asks curiously.

I let out a curt laugh, and Karlie just smirks and raises her eyebrows.

"That's just how it is, babe", I say, kissing Ellie on the top of her head. "Don't you like being the only princess?", I ask.

"Yeah, but a sister would be fun", she sighs, before running over to Luke, who I now notice is devouring cookies behind our backs.

I decide not to scold him. He was only little, and moments like this were somewhat adorable.

"Yeah, Tay, why doesn't Ellie have a sister?", Karlie asks jokingly, making me shrug my shoulders.

Did I want another baby?

Whenever I hold Stella, I start to miss that feeling of having a little human who completely depends on you all the time.

Luke was almost 2, and he didn't even wake up in the middle of the night anymore.

"We can't have another baby", I whisper to Karlie, making sure that Adam couldn't hear.

"Why not?", she laughs, bouncing Stella up and down as she gurgles.

"Because four kids would be crazy", I say firmly, smiling at Karlie.

Would four kids be manageable?

******

As I lay in bed that night, wrapped in Adam's arms, we finally get a chance to discuss Ellie's situation.

"So how do we explain it to her?", I ask nervously, as Adam rubs my back reassuringly.

"She's only 7 years old, babe, we don't have to explain it all to her. Just tell her that she's taking a special vitamin when you're giving her the medication", he says.

"We can't tell her that forever Adam", I sigh.

"Babe, you heard the doctor. Child anxiety isn't like normal anxiety. It hopefully won't be here forever", he whispers.

"Okay, well Ellie needs to be in a calm environment from now on, so from tomorrow onwards I'm introducing some new rules in this house", I say.

"What kind of rules?", Adam asks playfully.

"No running in the house, no fighting, Noah is not allowed to hit, no skateboards inside, Adam, no electric airplanes inside, and Luke needs to learn not to scream and cry at unnecessary times", I say, reciting the list that I had made earlier. "The doctor said that all of those things can trigger panic attacks", I say.

"Good luck with the last one babe", Adam says, chuckling.

The last rule was going to be hard. Luke was my baby, and I had a habit of comforting him for the littlest things.

I start to remember the conversation I had with Karlie earlier, about having another baby.

Did Adam want another baby?

I wanted to ask, but I couldn't bring myself to open my mouth again.

___________________________
Oh my gosh Taylor wants another baby 💕

Will she build up the strength to ask Adam??

Thoughts?

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