#70

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You know I'd rather be dead then be here with you. I'm sick of acting so happy sometimes I want you see what I've done to myself, I want you to see the scars, the burns, everything. Oh but wait I'd just be seeking attention because that's all I ever do right? I knew I shouldn't have told you anything but you said oh I understand I won't say anything but there you go. I just need to keep my feelings to myself like I did until you came along and made me trust you. I just need to keep everything to myself until late at night and let it all out like I used to do. I need to get the razors and pills back. I need to feel that relief of pain when that cold blade slides against my skin. I need my happiness back.

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