sugarcoating

i

"Hey, Clarity!" My friend, Ramona, greets. Except when she says my name, the letter 'r' is messed up due to her native language. I usually make fun of it - in a joking way, of course - but I'm so beyond that today. Especially today.

"Hi, Monee." I sigh and slump in the chair next to her, scowling at the café's menu for anything warm to order before my insides freeze to death. I think the news forgot to mention that it's going to be -34974 degrees today.

"What's wrong?" Ramona frowns. "You don't know how to get there, do you?"

"I do, but it's not a train I'm traveling by." I reply in annoyance before I sit up more properly and glare at my phone on the table. I glance at the confused eyes of my best friend hidden behind glasses.

"What? Then how-"

"Harry offered a ride." I cover my face with my gloved hands and wait for her reply, probably after a gasp. After a heart seizure.

"What the hell? Harry, your ex?" She exclaims loudly and I shush her, shooting an apologetic smile at the disapproving-looking woman at the table next to us.

"Please don't make me feel any worse about this," I groan and try to sink in the feeling of complete surprise on Ramona's face, with her full, puckered lips pouted and her eyes round as saucers.

And she has a right to be surprised. At me, and Harry. He'd shown up unexpectedly at the train station this morning and looked just as grim as I did when they announced they were out of tickets to book. Somehow, he got me to accept his offer to ride with him all the way to Cheshire East in his old car. He was my only hope to not get disowned by missing another family holiday.

"Can I just say, what the actual frick? I thought you hated him!"

I shook my head. "He's my only way there, Monee. I can't afford not spending a family Christmas this year."

"Oh, God, you're really doing this," She shook her head and looked at me warily, making me grimace as it sank in.

"It'll only take two hours top. Just two hours." I sounded like I was convincing myself more than Ramona.

Mine and Harry's relationship was built in Cheshire. We grew up there together, and completed high school while in a relationship. When we finally graduated, we decided to continue on together at University of Westminster in London. Throughout freshman year, problems started to glow and set fires between us. When it was all said and done, we were over. Starting junior year with no boyfriend was somewhat unsettling considering I've had a solid one for years straight. But when your boyfriend gets to the point where he says shit like "I wanna try new things," you know you can't stay.

Harry was, in other words, bored with me.

I didn't receive the shock ideally but I went along with it, eventually telling him that I feel the same -as if that will cover my scarred pride. He started seeing other girls shortly after the split of the "it" couple, as we were called, and I couldn't ignore the clear fact of how easy it was for him after us. So, I distanced myself from everyone, hiding away in my own bubble. But he still found a way to interact with me; during classes, projects, etc., and now this.

I'm going to be in a car. With my ex. For two whole hours.