Caught Between a Mate and Love

Chapter 5: Time Off, Ruined

"It's gonna be ok," I whispered, but her urgency scared me. How could it be ok when she was right? We both had two options and neither of us were ready to choose. Love or your pack. In a way we were equal. Even though she would be likelier to stay with Mickey for life, they both had to be ready to sacrifice at a moment's notice. I had to sacrifice, but not Zack's life. I had the option to run to New York with him and that would be against pack laws. Unless I mated with someone of another pack, I couldn't leave my family.

By the time she calmed down I convinced her to go and let me finish cleaning up, as long as she made the right decision. I know I sounded pushy, but to reject your mate is to reject yourself.

I began to bend down and reach for the biggest pieces to toss separately when something fell out of my apron. A clipped red rose with a note attached. Perplexed I looked around as if someone just handed it to me but of course I was there by myself so my only choice to find out who it was from was to open the note.

'Rita, Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage, said by Lao Tzu. I love you deeply, please, I need to see you again. Your nerd, Zacharius.'

I laughed to myself wondering how he managed to get that in my pocket, and thought back to the man who bumped into me. He must have paid him to do that. What a smart nerd I loved. I cleaned the diner as fast as I could and looked at the time. I decided to tell my father I was going for a run, since I had a long day, through our channel and drove to Zack's house. I knocked.

Zack opened with the biggest smile on his face, which I had to return. We stood for a minute, just smiling before I jumped him with a hug. He laughed and shut his door, still holding me. I caressed his face, looking at it. It was the longest we'd ever gone without contact and obviously he was as stressed about it as me.

I looked around the empty house, "Where is everybody?"

"The guys are in New York for the week and Sarah went to see her mother tonight. It's just me," he grinned, proud of himself, and kissed my cheek. "Mmm, what has been keeping you so busy?"

"Tony's getting married and dad doubled my work shifts," I shrugged and continued smiling. It felt like I forgot what his face looked like and here it was, clear to me. His big nose, big eyebrows, big hair, everything that I loved was staring at me, ready to be with me again.

"Married?" He asked, putting me down and leading me to the old couch. "Not surprised, he takes everything seriously."

I chuckled but didn't respond. I didn't want to talk, I wanted to see him, be with him, use the little time we had. He felt too far away, so I decided to move one knee over him, to straddle him. He looked a little surprised but pleased, putting his hands behind my back.

"It's been too long and I've been to stressed," I whispered huskily, beginning to kiss him finally. I stroked his hair, bit his lip, but he wasn't responding as enthusiastically. Sure, he kissed back, but he didn't feel as excited as me. I sat back. "What?"

"Nothing," he replied with a small smile. "Can I just look at you for now?"

I sighed and nodded, making him chuckle again, but I didn't move. I stared back at him, into his deep brown eyes, trying to decipher why he was so reluctant. It's not like we were active every single time we saw each other, but after a while you miss it. Especially when you work so hard and need something to help you relax.

"Did something happen when we were apart?" I asked suspiciously. He shook his head.

"I'm just thinking, it would suck to do this for the rest of our life," he shrugged. I got off him.

"Doing what?" I could feel a bubble of anger slowly rising. Was everyone trying to stress me out? He tried to hold my hand but I wouldn't have it.

"Fuck, Ritz, you know what I mean," he stood up and rubbed his head. "Sneaking around, stressing out until we see each other again. It's like, we're together and then not. A sham."

I sat back, hurt, "This isn't forever."

He exhaled loudly, then got on his knees in front of me and took both of my hands.

"I know, I'm sorry," he looked into my eyes. "But it's gonna be a long time until we do get to actually be together, isn't it?"

I bit my lip and nodded. He did sense my urgency before, then. He could tell it wasn't going to be easy for a long time. I released one of my hands to touch his face.

"Let's be happy now, Zack, remember your note? Let's be strong, for each other," I slid off the couch to be level, or more level, with him. He smirked. I took that as an agreement and kissed him, feeling him act more responsive. I smiled against him. "One day we'll be in our little shitty apartment in New York, drinking cheap coffee and without a care in the world."

He smiled back, "One day."

I kissed him again. And again. And again, pulling him on the couch again, this time on me, not sparing any seconds between kisses. I was frantic, knowing that soon someone would channel me, especially if the guards tonight connected the dots that I wasn't running near any of them. His hands on my waist pulled me up, onto the couch, with him over me, smiling.

"I love you," he went for my neck, making my breathing hollow.

"I love you," I replied, hitching a leg onto him. I never wanted to let go, but the sorry swung open right in front of us, revealing a smirking Sarah. We both jumped.

"Sorry," she chuckled and walked past us, closing the door and dragging a bag. Zack sighed and got off me, holding my hand and pulling me up as well. She came back, tying her hair up. "My family decided to have dinner without me at the Olive Garden! Whoopee. Anyways, I would have texted, but I didn't think I would be interrupting."

She seemed completely oblivious to our pissed off faces. I got up, knowing I should have been leaving anyways.

"I've gotta go," I waved at the both. "I'll try see you guys in a few days, who knows."

Then I left to repark my car at the diner and run like hell to release not only my anger, but Zack's smell. My day off had been effectively ruined.

Zack's POV

"Seriously Sarah?" I scoffed and stood up. "She had at least ten more minutes."

"Look Zack, I love milk, but I'm not gonna drink it because I don't wanna throw up," she said. I gave her a perplexed look. "Just because you love something doesn't mean you won't get hurt. Both of you."

"Don't give me this talk again," I waved her off angrily and tried to walk away, but her burning grip held my arm.

"Her pack called me in," her blue eyes searched mine. "They want me to perform for them, for a price."

"You can't-"

"I have to! We can't live here if one of us doesn't help them! Besides, she had to find out one day," she shrugged and let go, leaving my wrist red. I pinched the bridge of my nose and exhaled.

"Well don't tell her about me, Sarah," I begged, "She'll be disgusted. Besides, she'll hate ,e enugh for not telling her I know everything and have secrets of my own."

"That's your fault," Sarah gave me a disgusted look and walked away, leaving me to think for a moment.

"Please, Sarah," I called out. I heard her sigh.

"I'm not going to lie if she guesses it," She promised. I nodded. "But you have to tell her soon!"

A/N: hello to all reading! Thanks so much for reading this far, I promise this will pick up soon, I just have to get the storyline straight. :) have a lovely day!