Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles

Chapter 3: Dinnertime!

Disclaimer- I do not mean any offense to anyone of any religion by the annotations I make. They're purely for fun, and I don't mean any harm by them

THIS IS NOT MY BOOK! I AM JUST COPYING AND PASTING IT FROM FANFICTION.NET. Also, anything in bold is not from the original book, they're just my annotations I included to try and get you through this fever dream.
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Author's Note: Hello, friends! I have struggled a lot about whether or not to keep going with this story; but, with a lot of praying, my husband and I have decided it is the right thing to do. We want our little ones to have good, Christian literature to read; and in this modern world, sometimes, that can be hard to come by! So I will just have to make do =)

"Pleased to meet you, Reverend Dumbledore," Harry replied enthusiastically; and got to his feet. "This sure is a beautiful place you have here!"

The Reverend beamed. "Why thank you, little one!" His voice had a distinctive southern twang to it that made Harry feel so safe and welcome. He knew in that moment that the Reverend was a man of God.

"This poor little one was being raised in a terrible situation," Hagrid declared concernedly. "He was watched by a babysitter every second of the day. His aunt saw him as part of her perfect life package. Like the big house, the fancy career, the speedy car."

Dumbledore shook his head sadly. "Too bad no one told her: parenting should be about the children. Not the parents. That is why it is called parenting!" (Solid logic)

Hagrid nodded wisely.

Dumbledore turned to Harry and announced authoritatively, "Now, you can start your classes tomorrow morning. Today, you can get settled into your dormitory. But first, why don't you eat dinner with my family and me?"

"Really?" Harry gasped excitedly. "I've never had a family dinner before!"

"Why don't you come with us, then!" Dumbledore cried kindly; and then got down on his knees. Everyone else did the same. Raising his large, massive, manly hands up to the heavens, Dumbledore bellowed in a voice even louder than Hagrid's had been, "Lord, please take us to the kitchen!"

Suddenly, they all found themselves in a tasteful, decorated kitchen!

"Wow!" Harry shouted in awe. He was still getting used to the power of prayer! Sometimes, we take the wonderful things the Lord gives us for granted (Yea cause we can all apparate via praying); and it takes a newcomer to the fold for us to understand just how blessed we are! "That was amazing!"

Hagrid smiled knowingly. "God is an amazing guy."

"He sure is," the reverend's wife chuckled, before getting down to her knees and raising her own hands upwards. "Dear Lord, please set the table with the sky-blue cloth and the Sunday dishes, and please give us biscuits fried golden brown and gravy, creamy mashed potatoes, my great aunt Eleanor's corn casserole, corn on the cob slathered with butter, and for dessert, some chocolate raspberry cookies." (Either do it yourself or have the house elves do it. Wait, no. Let me guess. Instead of house elves, you have proper, well-dressed altar boys, don't you?)

All of these things appeared on the table exactly as the reverend's wife had asked for them, masterfully prepared and delicious-smelling. Harry's mouth dropped open. Truly, this woman was a real Proverbs 31 wife! (Ok Proverb 31 is way to long to type out but basically it's about a woman doing work for herself. Ironic)

"Hermione!" The reverend summoned loudly. "Dinnertime!" (Come get y'all juice)

Immediately, and with cheerful obedience, an eleven-year-old girl in a pretty, pink dress with a matching bow came running down the stairs. She ran over to her father; and gave him the winning smile that daughters have.

"Welcome home, daddy!" She smiled, and then turned to his wife. "Can I help at all with dinner, mommy?" (They just told you dinner's ready)

"It is all prepared, thanks be to God," her mother retorted gracefully. Hermione nodded knowingly.

"Hermione, I would like you to meet Harry Potter, our newest student at Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles," Dumbledore introduced magnanimously. "Harry, I would like you to meet Hermione Granger, my beloved daughter." (Why doesn't she have their last name? Did Dumbledore abduct a child?)

"Pleased to meet you," Hermione responded sweetly, with an shy grin.

Harry could barely respond. This was the most beautiful young woman he had ever come across. So different from all the girls in public school; who were focused on trying to be like the career women they saw on The Sex and the City. This little one was the picture of innocence and godliness. (Shockingly, the most realistic thing about this is an 11 year old watching SATC)

"Now," Dumbledore pronounced genially, "let's eat!"

As the holy men, women, and little ones dug into the delicious manna the Lord had granted them; the conversation amongst the adults turned to darker topics. Harry listened intently; and he did not understand it; but he was very interested.

"Dark days are coming," Hagrid pronounced gravely around a mouthful of casserole. "Evil forces are coming into this world; and the little ones at Hogwarts may be our last resort!"

"Psalm 127:5," Dumbledore referenced solemnly, and the others around the table nodded knowingly. Hogwarts might be the last hope for the forces of good in this world! (Psalm 127:5 is 'Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.')

Author's Note: Blessings!