I'm not sure if I can go on any longer. The world. The world is corrupted. Fucking corrupted.
Like me.
Everything's so... dark and. And soundless. Like I'm living a lie. Like everything is just for show.
Fake.
I don't think I can go on. Not for long. It's like I'm in a dark dark room. And the darkness is comforting. It envelopes me. The softness caressing my skin; my body. As if saying to me 'come on, i can bring you to a better place, where everything's in technicolour. Where you can be free.' But no matter how hard I try, how fucking hard I try, I'm always a step too far; too late.
I do try. I try to be normal. To have friends. But it never seem to work out. No one wants you. No one wants you fully and truly and just you, without the mask and make up and fakeness. I do try.
Maybe not enough.
I'm slipping. And falling. Down. Into darkness and emptyness. Forever.
Infinite.
But I still try.
I always do.
Always.
Smiles; everywhere. How do people manage to be so carefree? So... happy? Like the world is alright and there's no wounds to be healed. How? Its not right. How do they give out smiles like they are worth nothing?
I can't.
I want to sleep.
And never wake up.
Never.
