Happy as Heck,

I don't wanna do this,

I honestly hate it when things get sour between me and Shelby, but it happens with friends, right..?

Anywhore the day after the man dies his funeral takes place. When does that ever happen? I guess they were expecting but who knows?

I don't.

I really feel like making a video but I don't know how and I absolutely can't without Shelby considering we are dreamyourlifefilms and I made it pretty clear it's both or none.

That was a run-on sentence. Oohps sorrynotsorry.

I suppose I'm just nervous about the funeral. I've already cried for a long time this morning. The road on the way to the church isn't very smooth and it doesn't help that I want to throw up because of my crying. I look at my dad and his eyes are puffy as well. I look down at my dress and realize I haven't grown since the seventh grade. I'm in a dress that I wore to my cousin's wedding when I was thirteen. 

A lot happened when I was thirteen. You know, first year being a teen and things seem pretty fucked up so. That's when Shelby and I really became best friends. For food or not for food.

The church slowly comes into view and I wince when I see the black car that carries the casket. Upon walking inside, I can almost feel depression with everyone's horrible mood. I see my aunt crying on the front row and I walk up to her and hug her.

"It'll be okay.." I soothe. She just hugs me tighter. When I walk away, the front of the room catches my eye and I find myself absentmindedly wandering to my uncle's casket.

"Hi.." I say through the tears. "I'm gonna miss you...lots.." I laugh painfully through the tears.

I look up at the ceiling, hoping to get a response. I squeeze my eyes shut when I can almost hear a faint 'I love you.' Dropping on my knees next to the casket probably wasn't my best idea. Now I have no idea how I'm going to get up. Not in a physical sense, but my emotions and mentality won't allow me to rise to my feet. I sink down and just begin to cry. It's when I feel my dad's large hand on my shoulder that I know it's time to go sit down. Through most of the sermon I have my hands buried in my face. I just really wish there was someone there I could just hug and never let go. Someone who'll tell me it's alright and kiss the top of my head, whispering comforting things into my ear.

But when does that ever happen?

OKAY THIS IS REALLY JUST A FILLER AND NOW I'M DOING AN AUTHOR'S NOTE

WHAT IS THIS

Okay so uhm cough half of this stuff is actually based on my life ._. I really do have a best friend named Shelby, our real channel is dreamyourlifefilms, and the whole Thrift Shop and whipped cream thing did happen and we really plan on doing these things but sadly those haven't happened yet :c MY UNCLE DIDN'T DIE THOUGH YAY. And honestly I would probably cry if I went to VidCon. I plan on going either next year or the next o: WHEN I GET A JOB OOHPS NOBODY'S HIRING NOW so in about two months you can actually check out videos Shelby and I will make but for now they will be ghetto because we have to do them with her phone. I am currently in a whole different state and well I can't do much without a camera or Shelby. If you would like, you can stalk her c; I believe her instagram is still fawkyouboo_ but I'm not sure. I'll try to post it in either the next chapter or the next c: *smiles devilishly*