Heartbreaker - A Jiley fanfiction

The kiss

These James's feature were what made me learn how to do an aerial, which I would have never learnt if it wasn't for his encouragement.

Flashback

We had just came back from winning Regionals and we were all in the Studio just messing around. Actually they were all messing around. Me and Emily were sitting on a bench. She was acting a bit strange lately, avoiding Eldon and Michelle, but knowing Em the way I do, i know it's better if I don't ask anything.

They are all doing tricks and flips, and I can't help but feel a bit sad and insecure. Basically everyone here at the studio can do acro... But I can't... Nothing, zero, nada...

I stare at Chloe who had just done a back flip. I didn't really know that she could do it because she is very ballet, but she is really good! I wish I was like her... But I would never be able to do it...

Suddenly, I feel a hand on my shoulder. I look up and see James smiling down at me. "Hey!"

"Yo, why the long face, Riles?" James asks sitting next to me, with his arm aroud my shoulders, pulling me closer.

I sigh and look to the floor. "It's just I wish that I could do tricks and flips like you guys do..."

James grabs my chin gently, making me face him. "Then why don't you try?!" "Me? No, James, I could never do it!"

"Why not?" James asks looking at me confused. I open my mouth to answer but I don't really know what to say. " See! Of course you can do it! Not from one day to the other, because you know, we took like years to learn everything but with practise you will be able to pull it!"

"You think so?" I ask, and he know I want his honest opinion. " Yo, baby girl, you can do everything you want, you just have to believe in yourself. Tell you what! Let's go right now to Studio B and you will learn something... Like... I know, an aerial. You're gonna learn how to do an aerial!"

" An aerial? James, I..." I start but we cuts me off, picking me up and carrying me bridal style to Studio B, which made me giggle and gain looks from everyone.

He puts me down and says " Let's make a deal. Everytime you get it right, you get a kiss. Fine?"

I look at him, considering his offer... " Fine!" I agree which makes him smile. "Let's go, do it"

Let's just say that it took me more than he thought it would for me to get it right! And a few bruises... But when I did, I just started jumping up and down, and he ran in my direction, picking me up and spinning me in the air.

When he is about to put me down, we connected our lips. We kiss passionately for a while. I just feel so happy that I could do it and that James believed in me, I don't know what I would do without him... He is just so important to me... He makes me feel safe and secure about myself. He is my everything.

He finally puts me down. Our eyes are locked and I can see the pride he feels in me, expressed in his brown eyes. I hug him tightly and whisper "Thanks, James!". "Don't even worry about it!" He answers making me smile.

End of flashback

I head to Music Room, just so excited to tell him that we got the duet. I know that he is rehearsing with Beth , but I don't really see any problem there. It's not like I haven't been to one of their rehearsals... And this is really important!

When I get to studio B, I freeze at the door. I can't believe what is happening before my eyes...

James and Beth are ki... Kissing! They are kissing... Their lips are touching! My eyes are filled with tears...

I don't even know what is happening... They are their suking each others lips and James is 't doing anything! He is kissing her back! Does that mean he wants to do it...

I feel the tears running down my face, burning my cheeks.

My heart is broken... I just feel completely empty... Like if I had nothing left... Literally, as if someone had ripped my heart from my chest... I can't believe he could possibly do something like this to me...

Why James? Why are you doing this to me? I thought you love me! But why did I think that?

I foccus on what is happening in front of me. Their lips are still attached! I feel my head spinning, as if I was about to pass out... I run out of there to the cubbies and get my bag.

I run outside the study, to catch some fresh air. I hear voices calling my name but I can't think about it. I am still crying heavily and I let out a cry I didn't know I was holding. My chest hurts as if I had just run a marathon...

All that is in my head is James and Beth kiss... They kissed forever... Why did it happen? Maybe he still has feelings for her... I know they had something in the past but I thought... I just thought he loved ME... But I was so stupid to think that...

I begin walking home, tears always sliding down my face throught the whole way. My house is close to the studio. In 5 minutes I am home.

I run to my room and lock it. Nobody is home, but I really want to be alone now, and Emily should get home any minute. I also turn off my phone.

I lie in my bed, putting my legs close to my chest and my arms wrapping them, just like a ball. I rock my body from one side to the other. I let out more loud cries, and just stay there lied down, sobbing.

I was so stupid to think that James loved me! He is a player for God's sake! Everyone knew that! Emily warned me... But I was silly and let myself believe he had changed... But apparently he hasn't! And why would he even change for someone as uninteresting as me... Really, Riley?! What were you thinking?

How could I open myself to someone like that! James was my everything! He was my rock, he was my safe heaven. Whenever I felt down, one hug from him and everything would get better. But now that he was the one to hurt me, what am I suppose to do?

I need him so much... I need him to tell me that he loves me, that that kiss meant nothing! To tell me that everything will be okay and that we will be fine. But it won't! He can't say that! Because he messed up! He ruined our relationship! And by doing it, he ruined me... Because I needed... Ineed him to tell me I can do anything in the world. I need him to make me feel confident!

I know it was a really stupid move to fall so much for someone... To let someone get so involved in your life, to the point where you can't imagine your life without that person... But without James I am stuck... I feel like nothing in this world will be okay... Because je was the one to make it okay!

I was always insecure and depressed. I always felt inferior and plain, but then James proved me I was wrong... Or maybe I wasn't...

Maybe he was just playing with my feelings like he did to God knows how many girls... I was just another one in his list... Just one that lasted a bit longer... But just another one...

That thought destroys me... Just to consider that idea, makes me feel sick...

One single tear drops my eyes and lands in my hand, right in the ring James gave me last week, when he had our 4 month aniversary... Was that time just a lie?

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! I hope you liked it! I am not sure whether or not I should continue this story... Or if it is good at all... But let me know! And give suggestions if you want!