Loving the Shadow

One: The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants

It's finally happening.

My mom's been waiting for months to finally put on her white dress and walk down the aisle to marry Pete. She deserves it.
When I say my mom is the epitome of beauty, I really mean it. She effortlessly looks stunning; with her natural blonde curls falling over her shoulders and the the little amount of make up she has on, all the focus is on her shining emerald green eyes. She is a mirror to Jess.

Jess, by the way, is my twin sister. She and I grew up doing everything together... I mean, duh, we are twins. But I literally mean EVERYTHING. My mom always made us wear matching outfits and enrolled us into the same hobbies, which always changed year to year. We've done gymnastics, karate, music lessons and soccer.... It's not surprising to say that Jess excelled at them all. She's always been the favorite, although my mom would never say that out loud.

Then there's me. Simple, boring Lola. I try to stay in the shadows and usually, that happens without any effort thanks to Jess. Don't get me wrong, I'm not in any way jealous of my sister. She's amazing and that goes without say! I like the way I live my life, going unnoticed. I also got mom's emerald green eyes, but I got dad's brown straight hair rather than the blonde curls. Not that I'm complaining, it helps me blend in.

As for my dad... he passed away when Jess and I were 7 due to a fire. To make things worse, It was the night of his anniversary with mom. He was rushing home from the office and went to pick up a bouquet of flowers. When he arrived, he found the little flower shop in flames and the owner screaming inside. He sacrificed his life to save that of another... I'm proud to say that he died a hero, but that doesn't stop us from missing him all the time.

Here we are though, ten years later when my mom finally allowed herself to love again. Pete is a good guy and he makes my mom happy, that's all Jess and I want.

"Lola! We're trying to take pictures, don't look so spaced out!'' Said Matt, our 13 year old soon-to-be step-brother.

I hadn't realized they made their vows and shared a kiss until Matt snapped me out of it to take pictures. I look to my side just in time to catch the weird glance Jess sent my way. I shrugged it off nonchalantly.

"SMILE!" Said the photographer, as we all followed suit.

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After the wedding had passed, our time was dedicated to moving into Pete's house. He lived in the richer part of the city, with a big house... not mansion-like... but still too big for a family of five. I didn't mind it though, at least then we'd all get our own rooms.

The good part? We didn't move too far from our old house and had the chance to finish senior year at the same high school

The bad part? The first day of senior year was tomorrow.

And with that, I let out a big groan and face planted into my bed

Only a couple of minutes had passed before Jess came into my room yelling.

"Come on Lola!! Tomorrow is our first day! Every year it gets more and more exciting!" She said with actual happiness and amusement in her eyes... like REAL happiness.. about SCHOOL! Yup, that's what I have to deal with.

"Its not all that exciting..." I said staring blandly at her.

"Oh come on, Lighten up! It's our senior year, only good can come. Now let's go, you know the drill!"

"ughhhhhhhhh" Was the sound coming out of my mouth as I lazily got off my bed and followed her to her room.

We do this every year before the start of classes. We start off by picking the next day's outfit then stalk all our friends on Instagram and Facebook to get a recap of what they've been up to this summer. That way, we're ready to strike up any conversation tomorrow....although that was more Jess's thing. But I went with it.

After a couple of minutes, she came out of the washroom dressed in outfit number one,

"Okay so how about this? This is cute right?" prompted Jess as she showed off the black jeans and light flowery blouse with a huge smile.

I took a glance at her until... "Wait.. hold up.. are those my pants?!"

"What! No!" she screamed in defense

"Jess... since when do you even own anything black" I asked as I arched one of my eyebrows

"Hey, I have...." She trailed off as she frowned, trying hard to think of something black in her closet, before screaming out triumphantly "my little black dress!!"

I rolled my eyes, of course it had to be a dress.

After about two hours (she tends to be a perfectionist) we finally settled on outfits for the both of us. Hers was, unsurprisingly, an orange cute knee-length dress with flowers on it, and mine, also unsurprisingly, was MY black jeans and an Adidas hoodie.

Then came step two. We settled on the couch downstairs with some tea and each pulled out our laptops.

"Okay, said Jess, I'll stalk the boys we know... just cause.... well... I wanna..."

Yeah, that was BS... Jess's two year boyfriend, Nick, broke up with her before summer started. She was devastated at first, but with some help from her best sister ever (aka me!) she's been back on her feet. She ignored all messages, pictures or posts that had to do with him all summer, so I couldn't let her spend hours on his pages.

"Nah, Jess. You do the girls, I was hoping to get a look at how the boys have changed over the summer" I said with a wink. I knew that would set a squeal out of her mouth, and I was right. I rarely ever talk about hot guys with her, not because I don't find any attractive, I just don't need the false hope...

"OMG! Lola go crazy! I'm so done with boys, so now we have to focus on you!" She was a bit too happy over Facebook and Instagram posts, but at least I managed to get her to refrain from wasting her time on Nick again.

We sat there sharing stories about what each of our friends had been up to until 10pm when Jess decided it was time she needed to sleep in order to wake up refreshed.

I followed her upstairs and was about to close the door to my room until she asked from across the hall:

"Any cute guys I have to dare you to talk to tomorrow?" She said with a hopeful chuckle.

I cracked a small smile and shook my head.

"Aw, well i'm sure you'll change your mind after seeing them in person." she winked, before sharing a brief goodnight and closing the door to her room.

In bed, I couldn't help but think about the possibility of a guy finally noticing me as Lola rather than "Jess's twin"... And with that, I fell asleep.