The weight of the world in my spine. Geez why can't you pick up the phone? I mean yeah it's 1am and all but still. I'm going sick in the head trying to push you out of it. But damn it! Nothing is working, I want to feel something, I shouldn't give in but I let you in. You're turning me to mush, Kinsley and you haven't even spoken to me yet. Pick up the phone! I swear if you're with him I'm going to punch him.
"Pick up your phone Kinsley, don't say you're with him. Please be at home sleeping."
*message sent*
It's been two hours and I haven't heard from you, where the hell are you? Alexis said you left her house around 6pm and your parents said you went out around 11:30pm because they heard you trying to tiptoe past their room, they knew you'd leave even if they told you not to. Oh mother.. Pick up your fucking phone!
It's 6am I have to get dressed for school. You haven't texted or called me back. I hope you're at school Kinsley. I quickly pulled on a blue shirt and my shoes, put deodorant on, while grabbing my hoodie off my desk. I walked towards the front door-
"Honey? You're leaving already? Why don't you eat some pancakes" poor sweet mother.
"No thanks mom, save them for Devin and Lina" I smiled. Those buggers better be glad they get extra pancakes. "Bye mom, I love you" I heard her faintly shout an "I love you dear" after shutting the door. Now the walk to my personal hell, it isn't far from my house. Honestly it's probably about ten or fifteen minutes away.
Where are you Kinsley?
----
"Hey bud, what's up" Kevin said once he and Alexis walked up to my locker.
"Oh not much" I replied casually.
"For 'not much' your eyes are bloodshot" Alexis frowned. She's always been the more serious and caring one, not that Kevin and I aren't serious or caring, we are but she's more into it than us, almost like a mother.
"Yeah, what's going on?" Kev asked confused.
"Kin-"
"Hey guys!" Her voice. She's here, at school in plain sight. Once she reached us I gave her a tight hug to which she returned.. Thankfully.
"What are we talking about?" It was going to be about you. I wanted to say but didn't obviously.
"Oh nothing just Max over here was saying how Devin and Lina are probably going to oversleep." Phew, Kevin really saved my ass, sometimes I'm glad he knows my siblings so well.
"Oh" she said while making a face I couldn't decipher. I'm really glad she's okay.
"Sooo Kinsley, where were you last night? Your parents asked me if you were still at my place" Alexis questioned her.
"What did you tell them?!" She asked, well whisper-shouted ya know? Which only made Alex raise a brow.
"You idjit it was 6pm I told them you went home" of course she was but then she left.
"Guys, let's all get to class we have five minutes before the bell rings" they ignored me. Of course.
"Well if you must know I was at a party with Adam." Kinsley replies cooly. Why would she??!
"Why were you with.. Adam." I demanded.
"What's it to you, Max?" Seriously??
"I'm your boyfriend, Kinsley! Or have you forgotten? Adam isn't a good person" I said in a low voice. To which she scoffed.
"Boyfriend? You haven't been a good boyfriend, Max." She can't be serious. I've been anything but, I treat her like a princess. I run my fingers through my hair frustratedly. Alex is the first to drag me away from her leading me to class. Glad I have her in English.
Once we're sat at the back of the class with no one else here probably because class hasn't started.
"What's wrong with you Max!?"
"Excuse me??"
"You let her treat you like shit!" She exclaims.
"She's my girlfriend. Aren't they like that half the time?" She looks at me as if I'm the stupidest thing in the world. Which I probably am. "Look I know she isn't perfect, I know"
"Your eyes are bloodshot! You haven't been sleeping I know you haven't. The dark bags under your eyes are in plain sight, you were never like this. You let her change you but to what extent? So you'll lose sleep so you won't lose her?! You're hurting yourself, she's hurting you. Why do you let it happen?" She whispered the last part looking at her hands in her lap. She cares, I get it.
"Alex, I love her" I whispered.
"But to what length? Just so you'll continue to be hurt? No offense but if loving her means you get treated like shit and lose lots of sleep then I don't think you should love her anymore." She said softly. I know she's right but I love Kinsley, I know it's stupid but she's my true love, she wasn't always like this.
After the bell rang and the teacher started talking I put my hoodie up and put my head on the desk to catch up on some sleep before I barf. Damn it Kinsley.
