It had to be cake.
Oh, but why can't you just say what you want to? You might ask. Mainly because, firstly, France would not listen, and secondly, the best way to say it is with CAKE. So, there was his logic. And since his cooking was the worst off all the Powers- APPARENTLY- it should warn France off? Right? Gleefully smiling the island hopped off into his kitchen with something that could be called an evil laugh. Totally didn't see Russia near his window when that happened. Nope.
And so began his destroying of not only his kitchen but also the entire cookbook of cooking a cake, and really Victoria Sponges couldn't be that hard right? It was just putting a sponge into the mixture and - BOOM! Cieling crashed around him and England decided that maybe putting in a small amount of TNT hadn't been a great idea. ( To be fair, it did say to put some spark into it. )
... I'll try again tommorow.
PLAN: CAKE
CONCLUSION: - FAIL -
~ ~ ~
In the end England did get France a cake. It was large and had looping frosting all over it. He'd brought if from one of the many cake shops that Japan owned - not that he'd tell anyone that he brought it from there - He could see America drooling over it as he shoved it across the table as quickly as he could, hey! It could be diseased already!
" Ah~! Mon ami! This is so ... riskey~! " And then France was lit in a dramatic pose with a rose just suddenly popping out of God knows where. Leaving the nation to go on and on and on in a massive monologue, he looked at the cake again. On top of the nice awesome looking icing where the words ' F u CK oFf ' in wobbly letters. Almost as if the cake maker had been drunk. Almost. (Alright England had been completely smashed but shh!)
Instead of France reading the words, he simply started to breathe in the cake. It was almost like America and his burgers. Suddenly England was scarred for life. Face palming, he said " Should just have got him bangers and mash..."
"W'at's zis about bangeers and maaash?"
PLAN: FUCK OFF CAKE
CONCLUSION: - EPIC FAIL -
YOU ARE READING
How England tried to stop France being pervy
Fanfiction... or how France continued to creep England out so much that he almost fell out of a window. NO SLASH IN THIS. JUST ENGLAND BEING ENGLAND AND FRANCE BEING CREEPY. >D *cover by LadyJadey, go read her stories plz!*
