The endless lifetime

The begining

It all starts out with a beginning.
You're brought into a great big world, with great big obstacles.
That's all there is to it.
But until you actually find out your calling, then that's when it all starts to matter.
I'm just like any other normal 16 year old girl.
Ambitious, emotional, crazy.
But, one day I was really standing on the brink of whether I should end it or keep going.
It all started years ago when I was just trying to figure out who I was.
I know who I am.
I'm Delaney Marx, an antisocial, short, blonde haired girl;
who just wants to fit in.
When I was in middle school I decided to make a goal for myself, I chose my path and I've stuck with it ever since. Now being a junior in high school; things are seeming a little more tough.
My goal is to make it into the
United States Marine corps
and be the best of the best.
I have my parents standing in the way, my grades, classmates. All of these challenges.
I kind of wondered what it would be like to actually have someone believe in you and mean it.
My parents are there, but they don't understand what I go through.
They don't understand my thought process, my feelings, why I choose to do certain things.
They're so tough on me sometimes and it's mind cluttering. It really, truly is. When I was a sophomore in high school I looked to a sort of bad way to deal with my problems.
I started cutting myself, not the best choice; but I did.
It just felt like when I put that razor to my arm, when I saw that blood, when I felt that pain; everything in my mind just cleared for a little bit.
Like I didn't have all of these things to worry about.
Now being a junior I'm still stuck on that habit.
That was my beginning, but there's always more to a beginning than just an end.