Harry Potter conversations

Voldemort is stealing Harry's fan girls, oh dear...

Harry: My magic brings Voldie to the yard! And i'm like ow! That's hurting my scar! 

Voldemort: You bet it is! Crucio!

Harry: What have I told you many times! I am invincible because the love from my fan girls protects me!

Hermione: I am so not your fan girl! 

Harry: *Feels a bit of pain from the crucio curse* 

Hermione: I am Voldermort's fan girl!

Voldemort: Oh wow! Now I have protection of love! Who's going to win now?

Dobby: You shall not harm Harry Potter!

Voldemort: Um elf? If you haven't noticed I am

Dobby: Oh right...

Voldemort: Come to my side elf and i'll buy you lots and lots of pairs of odd socks!

Dobby: Yippie!

Harry: *Feels more pain from the crucio curse* 

Cho: OH MY GOD! HARRY! 

Harry: What? 

Cho: VOLDERMORTS TRYING TO KILL YOU!

Harry: Yeah I never even noticed!

Cho: And by the way I don't care because i'm Voldermorts fan girl!

Harry: *Feels even more pain from the crucio curse and starts to scream like a girl*

Voldemort: I'M A BABE MAGNET! 

Harry: I was a babe magnet... 

Snape: WHAT THE DEVIL IS GOING ON?!

Harry: Voldie is stealing my fan girls!!!!!!!!

Snape: Oh shame...Potter you have potions homework to be getting on with, it's time you stop rolling around in pain and dreaming about Cedric and get on with your potions homework before you get the troll level for your O.W.L.S...

Harry: Ron didn't tell you about my dreams did he?

Snape: Oh yes he told me everything, it was quite amusing when he impersonated your scream I did have to chuckle to myself...

Harry: RONALD WEASLEY!

Ron: Yes mummy? 

Harry: I AM SO GOING TO BEAT YOU UP! JUST BECAUSE I HAVE DREAMS ABOUT THAT SPARKILING PRINCESS DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN GO AROUND THE SCHOOL AND TELL EVERYBODY!

Ron: *Whimpers* 

Snape: There, there Mr Weasley lets go make you some cookies because you joined the dark side

Ron: COOKIES!