The Pairing

Chapter 14: New Beginnings

Tarek fidgeted, his leg bouncing like mad. This wasn't where he wanted to be, sitting in Mateusz's office. He wanted to be with Lena, show her everything he'd accomplished in the last month while Avery healed her. Unfortunately, the overseer said one more day.

He could handle one more day—as long as he had forever afterward.

Mateusz sat at his desk, waiting with him. They hadn't spoken much in the last thirty days—only long enough for Tarek to punch him in the eye for agreeing to send Lena and him to Andor. No matter what the man said, he was the damn ERP overseer. He could've done something. Anything. He didn't. Thankfully, Avery had more courage.

"So..." Mateusz fussed with his glasses, pulling them off, cleaning them, and slipping them back on. "If you would allow me to explain."

Tarek turned his attention to the screens on the wall, always tuned on ERP's training centers. "I don't want to hear anything. Not a damn thing outside of 'I'm sorry.'"

"Well, then I'm sorry. I am. If I had a choi—"

"You're a Synod overseer!" Tarek leaped from his chair, no longer able to fake indifference, and pounded his fist on the desk, causing Kendal's hologram to flicker. "So many people are dependent on the choices you make. Doing nothing makes you as guilty as giving the assignment."

"When will you understand? When will it sink into your stubborn mind? I don't have a choice!" Mateusz stood too, his anger as bright as Tarek's. "I'm responsible for training the drones who do the bidding of Cassondra, the elders, the authority commander... I could give you a list longer than this desk."

"Don't you care about the drones you train?" Tarek stepped forward, his fist curling with the desire to punch Mateusz again. "I almost lost everything. If Avery wouldn't have helped, if she had cowered behind a desk like you—"

"You don't think I know how you feel? I do! I've lost someone I love, just like you." He pointed to Tarek's face, his voice cracking. "And I pray you do not have the same outcome with Lena as I've had with Kendal. So don't stand there and assume what I can and cannot do. I've suffered because of those bastards, too. Kendal still suffers."

Shit.

His anger deflated. Tarek scrubbed at his hair, glanced around, and then sat, gesturing for Mateusz to do the same. The overseer complied after a few moments, looking as lost as Tarek had been for a month.

Tarek gestured to Kendal's picture. "How is she?"

"The same." Mateusz pushed his glasses up with a shaking hand.

"What did she know, Mateusz?" A question he'd asked the man a thousand times, his friend always declining to answer. He had tried to ask Kendal, as well, but she refused to speak to him, refused to speak to anyone but Mateusz and Winston, it seemed. "What did she carry with her after death?"

Mateusz licked his lips, keeping his attention on Kendal's hologram. "Too much."

Tarek watched the hologram with him. "Lena knows too much also," he whispered like a confession.

"I know." Mateusz sighed. "And I would suggest you both keep it to yourselves. The elders catch wind..." He focused on Tarek, his gaze hard and serious. "You understand me, don't you? I will not be able to save you. No one will."

"You know...about Wardens?" He didn't intend to spread the truth, Mateusz's warning unnecessary. Nicolette was right; to give away that information would only cause more damage.

"All those in higher Synod positions know."

Tarek squeezed the bridge of his nose. Exemplar's entire foundation sat on a mound of lies. "How many other Wardens are Exemplians?"