Incarcerate

Entry Seven

“Aalia, please,” he grabbed my wrist and whispered. I harshly brushed his fingers off of my wrist as if they were made of burning coal.

“Don’t. Touch. Me,” I hissed and with that I stalked off to the sick excuse of a room and locked myself in. That’s when all the weariness took over and I just slid down by the door and let the tears flow; as silently as always. I can’t believe I let the one man, who got me into this mess, comfort me. I can’t believe he seemed ‘not so bad’. He can’t comfort me and he is bad. I hate him.

I think.

-End of Entry

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He watched her retreating small figure. A heavy load adjusted itself on his chest. He knew that this was completely his fault but it wasn’t his first time, he had brought a lot of girls here in his short two years but somehow, he could always bury the guilt away, then why with Aalia? His guilt was gnawing at him tediously, so much so that he just wanted to take her and run away, never look back. The biggest question that kept playing in his like a broken tape; Why Aalia?

A humorless laugh escaped his lips; he knew exactly why it was her. She was so different and strong, too hard headed for her own good and these qualities make it impossible for him to believe that her end could actually be something as shallow as slavery. He knew no one deserved it, but with all the other girls it was somehow easier to imagine them being slave; he could always force himself to imagine it that way, but with Aalia, it was just simply impossible.

Misery enveloped him in its merciless grasp. In a normal world, he would’ve brought her flowers, chocolates and would’ve taken her for dinner to make it up to her, but in that normal world, he wouldn’t be here, he would have been back home in Hampshire with a family that loved me and she would still be in South Africa, finishing her studies.  He wouldn’t have met her hence there wouldn’t have been anything to make up for.

He threw his head back and glared at the ceiling. She blamed him for everything, but of course she wasn’t wrong because he was to be blamed for everything. He closed his eyes, and for the first time in a long, long time, he let the memories from his past play in his head. He missed his mum and dad; He also missed Cass, even though they never got along. Random memory clips started playing in his head; a smile crept onto his lips as the memories of Cass’s and his tenth birthday played; he had stolen and hid her special blue dress;

‘Shay, give it back to me!’

‘I don’t have to listen to you’

‘Yes you do! I am older then you!’

‘By a minute, doesn’t count’

He may have given the dress back to her, or maybe he didn’t. She had threatened to tell their mom about his first crush and at that moment nothing was more embarrassing that liking a girl. The memory of their family picnic also flowed in. They used to be happy; He used to be happy. He realized that there were streams of tears going down his face but he didn’t make an effort to stop them, it felt good to let them flow for once. He was so tired of keeping all the pain in.

Soon the darkness engulfed him and sleep took him in under its numbing wing.

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Screams; Loud piercing screams that sounded so tormented and punished! He couldn’t tell if it’s real or not. Another string of horrendous screams filled his ears and the haze of sleep snapped. It wasn’t in his sleep, it was very real. He jumped off the couch and a blanket pooled at his feet.

He momentarily wondered where that had come from.

Before he could even think of an answer, more screams vibrate into the room. He sprinted in record time to Aalia’s room. His heart beat was so erratic that it felt it was going to jump out his mouth any time. He broke into her room and instead of finding someone hurting her, he just saw her feverishly twisting in bed. She looked horrible, her hair was clinging to her head because of the beaded sweat and her face was a picture of pure torture.

He ran and kneeled on the floor so that he was facing her. He placed his hands on her severely bruised face. Guilt flooded his conscious for the millionth time that day; it was his fault that she was having such torturous nightmares. He gingerly tapped her cheek and when he got no reaction, he moved to grip her shoulder and gave her a light tug.

“Wake up, Aalia,” he kept saying. Every time he didn’t get a reaction, the tug become harsher and his voice went up a notch, until he was full on shaking her. He just wanted to end whatever nightmare was consuming her but it had a pretty good grip on her and she just kept quivering in her hellish sleep.

“Aalia, wake up!” he gave a hard shove and scream at her. The deadly spell of the nightmare snapped and she jumped awake. Her eyes crazily darted all over the room until they finally landed on him. Her gaze softened a little bit and this made his heart melt. She seemed like she would ask him to lay with her, to hold her and he would. He wouldn’t refuse this girl anything because he was coming to like her a little; a little too much for comfort. She was about to say something but as always, nothing good ever lasted and her stone hard mask went back on. A labored sigh made its way out of Shay’s lips, he just wanted to make this better somehow but she won’t let him. She always blocks him out. It frustrated him to see that she couldn’t tell that he was her ‘kind of friend’.

“Why are you still here?” she coldly asked.

“You were having a nightmare,” he stated with his eyes still closed. He knew what was coming next. If only she’d let him hold her, comfort her but he knew better that she would never let her guard down.

“That was none of your business, get out,” she coolly commanded.

He got up wordlessly; there was no point in arguing with her. He warily started walking out of the room and toward the door when he it struck him. A smug smile plastered on his face and he turned to face her. A questioning look was splattered over her broken features.

“Thanks for the blanket,” Her face was priceless. She looked like she was caught doing something illegal and instantly started staring at her lap. For the first time, he was on the winning end; she couldn’t hate him that much. He walked out with an almost happy-ish smile. He was going to make this just a little fun. She needed a little normalcy; he wanted her to remember him as someone good.

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A/N: {not edited...sorry} okay guys, so here's another chappie. I hope you like it and please ignore any mistakes because it's not proof read :)

Thank you to all those readers that have been reading Incarcerate, Means a ton to me, can't thank you enough:)

Cheers,

Dodo