Dipped in Blood

The Emptiness of Loss

Empty.

That's all I felt, no remorse or guilt or sadness...just empty. The tables had turned and the unexpected had come true like a shot in the dark. The puzzles were easy to put together, like the pieces called me multiple times yet I refused to consider them. The most obvious conclusion to my pondering was that Eden had only been sent to town recently because of the undeniable love between mother and her. But instead of my mother sending her, Benith had done it to prevent any further connection between her and the forest, like a good father would do. This was the most inevitable situation-no twists, no turns just heartbreak.

But the reason behind Eden's dark behavior was unknown to me. How could a bond between to different beings be stronger than one of blood and bones? Was there a deeper meaning to all the havoc and suffering that this forest had placed, was there a specific reason I ran into it without hesitation? I pondered quietly in my mind while my feet walked in the direction of the last safe house.

Lost. Alone. Empty.

A voice chanted in my brain, begging me to listen but I still had doubt and somehow my doubt was hurting me. I let out a scream and covered my eyes in hope for the voice to stop, stop the pain, the anger, the remorse. I felt tears tickle the edge of my lip before landing softly on the ground. I screamed again before falling against a tree, questions hit my skull begging me over and over to just listen.

What are you running from?

What was the deeper meaning?

What do you truly want?

The last question was answered in the deepest part of my mind the moment I stepped in the forest. I wanted-no-needed someone or something to hold me and tell me that no matter what I was going through, it would be okay. I needed someone to love me the way nobody else could...no human could. I breathed irrationally before looking up at the sky in sadness. The sky rumbled with grey light while the trees brushed its surface from my view, it seemed angry in a way. I closed my eyes to feel a drop of rain run across my face and land in on my lap in a dark stain. I sat quietly under the tree as the sky cried for me.

***

I blinked rapidly before rubbing the sleep from my eye, the air was cold with a light moisture flouting through it. I notice the absence of light in the forest allowing fear to creep into my stomach. I was night. I get up at an inhuman speed before glancing at the water damage on the map, I was halfway to the safe house. I let out a shaky breadth before taking off in the direction of the safe house. Chanting in my head repeatedly: don't stop, don't listen, don't doubt. I race across sharp rocks and thick snow in a desperate hurry for the safety of a probably high platform, that without a doubt was a useless word for a safe house.

The night seemed to bring a supernatural feel to the discolored branches and shrubs that often got in the way of my running. The moon made the trees glow and the grass dance with peace, a low fog also set a mysterious aura to the forest floor that no normal fog could ever do. I send a carful last glance at my map before tucking it in the pocket of my shredded, dirt and neglected jeans. My eyes were slowly adjusting to the dark to reveal the silent night but my heart stopped when a beautiful sound floated into my ear.

A piano, if I was correct, was being played to a soft melody that could send someone running for the hills. But I just felt pulled towards it, the music listened to my heart and pulled at its broken strings. My feet seemed to be controlled by my heart as they walked hesitantly towards the soft sounds in the night. I walk to a considerable distance towards the melody before seeing a figure in the distance, I pull myself behind a tree and glide in the shadows closer. My curiosity got the better of me when I was in viewing distance as I peeked out from behind a large oak. A large, bulky figure sat quietly at a old yet grand piano, the figure was bathed in the light of the moon as it played my heart.

I gasp lightly when the piece ended and the figure looked up from its hunched position. It was a creature, a teddy bear to be exact, but its uniqueness shocked me most of all. The bear was plush and brown with a red shredded bow tided on its neck, but the scars and rips attracted me most. The bear seemed neglected and broken with its stuffing exposed and once stitched scars open, I felt sorry for the soft bear and a frown graced my skin. The bear got up and walked in the opposite direction but stopped when it heard me step on a broken branch, I barely noticed my step towards the bear till it turned around and stared into my soul with its beady black eyes.

It exposed a collection of sharp metal teeth before taking a menacing step towards me. But I felt no fear instead the scar across my heart seemed to burn like a itch needed to be scratched. The bear closed its mouth and whimpered while clutching its own heart, I frown deeply as the bear who towered over me stepped back and gave me a coded look.

To the girl who walked (ran) into the forest weeks ago this situations answer would be simple: run, but to the girl who found out her family was a bunch of complete psychopaths the answer was: listen.

For all the people who repeatedly told me to listen for once and understand that I wasn't the only person in the world, I stood still and listened. I ignored the fear and listened to it, embraced it and it somehow turned into something no one I knew ever had. I took a step forward and placed my hand over its, which still clutched its heart and let out a breadth.

"I'm here to listen."

I had turned fear into hope.