Clean ⇔ Cashton ✓

You Don't Love Me Like You Should

A/N: everyone go check out my new story "Ghost" please, and tell me what you think about it when you do! #shameless #self #promo

CALUM

Luke has acted a lot more different ever since the engagement, and I can't tell whether it's for better or for worse.

For one, he's always kissing my cheek or holding my hand or wrapping his arms around me whenever possible, which is definitely different. He used to kiss me and all that, but whenever he touched me it was more so that I wouldn't stand up and leave. Not just for the fun of it.

But he's also become a whole lot more controlling, in a way. He wants everything a specific way, and he expects me to do everything the way he wants it. He's become less strict about Ashton, which I find weird, but I don't dwell on it. I suppose he isn't too worried about me spending too much time with him, considering we are going to be married. I don't know, but Luke has gotten a bit harsher recently, and I'm not exactly sure how to handle it.

Today, Luke is having Andy over. When he told me, I hid my reluctance and went along with it so he'd be happy, but I absolutely despise it when Andy comes over. Andy is like Luke, but with no soft edges.

I sit in the den with Luke while we wait for Andy to arrive. I'm curled against Luke's side, Luke's hand in mine. He's squeezing my hand a bit too tight to be comfortable, but I don't say anything.

Luke watches the sports channel, and I zone out the minute he turns it on. I'm not much of a sports guy, I suppose.

The doorbell rings, and Luke slips away from me so that he can answer the door. I curl my feet under me as I watch him answer the door. Andy walks in with a big grin and greets his son grandly.

"Hey, son!" Andy exclaims. He walks towards me and nods. "Hello, Calum."

I blink at him. Luke furrows his eyebrows and pinches my side, and I jump.

"Hello, Andy," I say quickly. Andy nods, satisfied, and sits down. Luke sits beside me once again, but he keeps his hands in his pockets, not reaching for my hand.

"So, how's the engagement going?" Andy asks. Luke smiles.

"It's going great! We've started planning out the wedding preparations," Luke says. I bite my lip to resist correcting him for saying "we". He hasn't let me have a say in much, and when I do, he always shoots down my opinions. Luke has a vision for the wedding that I clearly don't get, so he told me he'd rather me stay out of it.

"Oh wonderful, wonderful," says Andy. He turns to me. "I'm thinking maybe a pure white suit for you. I can get it specially made."

"Yes, I think that would be nice," Luke says, turning and looking me over before nodding. I swallow the lump in my throat as they nod affirmatively and move on to the next topic.

I listen to them talk half-heartedly, focused on my white sock-covered feet. I wiggle my toes, watching the fabric shift. I close my eyes and listen to the steady beat of my heart to block out the Hemmings' voices.

"Also, we might want to think of getting you a bigger house," Andy says, and I lift my head in attention.

"But this house is already huge!" I say, gesturing to the grand den area. The house really is massive, especially for only two people.

"But what about when you have kids?" Andy asks, raising his eyebrows at me. My blood turns cold, and I stare at him unblinkingly.

"Kids," I repeat, a bit shook up.

Andy looks impatient. "Yes, Calum. Kids. You'll have kids fairly soon after the wedding, I'm sure you'll need a larger house."

Luke catches my eye and nods in agreement. I look at him almost in a trance, not knowing what to do or say. Kids with Luke... the thought hadn't occurred to me in so long. I can't imagine having children with him. It scares me to death, because I have no idea how he'll parent them. I don't know what kind of dad he'll be.