Blood Lies

Chapter 20

I run towards Josh as I leave the front door, Tammy follows behind. I throw my arms around Joshua's neck in excitement.

"You seem happy today," He chuckles with delight.

"I sure am, we have a couple weeks break from school! A little while back me and the gang arranged to go on this camping trip. I highly doubt Amanda will be going but will you come? Will you come with me?" I bounce with joy. He shift nervously without replying, my heart drops... he doesn't want to go. He notices my face fade from excitement to disappointment.

"Nadine I would love to... but you can't be around me at night," He speaks brushing my cheek with his thumb.

"Why? Are you naughty?" I look up at him feeling daring as I try lighten the mood, hugging his waste and winking at him cheekily. He stops smiling and stares out to the sky like he didn't mean to say something or just let out a bad secret, his lips have pressed together into a fine straight line. He's serious.

  "Josh?" I ask, voice shaking. I watch him exhale while he thinks intently. I watch his eyes glisten in the morning light.

"You will find out soon enough; all I good time babe. I just don't think I can go this time though" Josh turns and looks back down at me, I bring my hand up to touch his face, but before I can he takes my hand, interlocking our fingers. I stare at him, waiting for him to explain but he just looks away. Why so mysterious?

"You can tell me anything, please come. The others are in couples, if you don't go I don't want to go," I take his face turning it towards me, so I can get him to look at me. He smiles and brings his lips to mine, I kiss him back tenderly.

"Ok, I will come, but please when the light of the moon rises above, keep your distance from me," He whispers into my ear. I look up at him again, he forces a smile out but all I can do is stare deep into his eyes.

  I wonder what troubles him, why is it not wise for me to be around him at night? What does he turn into some extremely dangerous monster? How pathetic? Maybe he is just scared of becoming intimate with me? Yes! That would have to be it; maybe he just isn't ready for that yet. He chuckles; I frown at him for a second before he kisses my fore head again, and then hugs me tighter.

"What aren't you telling me? You can talk to me you know, I will understand, I promise," I step back taking both his hands in mine. I glance at Tammy who has decided to start walking. I tug him to follow.

"I know I can but I don't think you will understand this Nadine, there are just somethings in life people can't explain, or understand. Somethings just have to be kept secret"

I stare at him, what does he mean?

"What do you mean?" I breathe.

"You just have to trust me ok, I just have to make sure you are ready. You have the choice to walk away, but if I tell you I can't let you do that, like I said somethings just have to be kept secret. For everyone's sake"

"I don't understand Josh, you aren't making any sense what so ever," I push him to explain. He looks at me with longing eyes.

"We need to leave the conversation here. I am sorry, I just can't tell you; not here, not now. You are just going to have to wait, you're going to have to trust me," He keeps a serious straight face as he waits for my reaction.

I turn away keeping my hand in his. My head fills with millions of questions, I say nothing. We say our goodbyes to Tammy and walk on to school in silence. I distance myself from him slightly trying to figure this all out. Each lesson passes by in a blur. I try my hardest to put it to the back of my mind. I should be happy that I am going away with him. He agreed to go but why does my gut tell me something is wrong. Why do I feel like I should just stay away? Maybe it's the way Amanda kept telling me he's dangerous? Nothing makes sense no more; my whole life has become a disaster.