About a certain return

Part 16

I was surrounded by the Painful that I have been, and gladly wanted to get rid of it, but how? Who was I? Which of them was I?

- Leave me alone, I shouted! Leave me alone! What do you want from me? I was wrong...

- You haven't been wrong.

- I had been wrong...

- You haven't...

- Pull him out!

- I'm sorry!

- Out...

I have been pulled out from amidst them, dragged out, I saw them trying to get hold of me, some of them succeeded but... I was back alongside with the bright Princes.

- The alive water? It was full of my sins! I said, frightened...

- No whatsoever, said the Leader. You didn't get rid of them.

- What are you talking? I addressed him rudely. So you know better than I do?

- I and only I...

I was going berserk. Who was he? What upward did he have comparing to me? How did I get myself new leaders, where they were taking me? All I knew is that to get to the surface, we had to climb up...

- You're deluding me, I said. How can I show people the way to Light through these endless catacombs? Who would follow me? I'm going back.

I went, very determined, back I only needed to get back to the lake, which was left behind already, through the mist, through another channel... that way... That way? It was high up, on the right. How furious was I! There were many exits towards the lake, I could clearly remember. "I'll see, I will get back my personality... I can handle this... I will manage. Why did I follow these strangers in the first place?" In my rage, I didn't notice a terrible fact. So, I was completely weightless, I could fly, without any effort, of concentration or of any other kind, at any height I wanted. And I set off quickly... but they managed to catch up with me and stop me.

- You cannot draw back, said the dark one. It is an expected reaction, after you've passed through the lake. If needed, we'll attach you to us until you pass the Funnel. After that you'll be absolutely free, and after we pass the Great Barrier you will be completely alone. Listen to us! For you there' is no way back. The paths we used to get here are already blocked. You'll get lost inside Garia's catacombs, a soft target that she doesn't deserve.

- So you admit I cannot get back, so you admit you cheated me. You hypocrites! Why did you tempt me? Aren't you the disguised devils that you told me about?

- You'll soon see the devils, the Leader reassured me. Tie him up!

I had been wrapped up into something gluey, and then dragged on the paths known or foreseen by them. Known, for sure. I was struggling to get out continuously: You have no right, you made yourselves an enemy, I will kill you, one by one, yes...

I was like a child tormented by abdominal pain and furious for his miserable fate. "What sort of criminal can they be?" Who do they want to offer me to? And why me? And why right now? I was struggling in vain, I was carried without any effort towards a funnel, from where I could hear a terrible whirlwind.

- Here it won't be easy, I was told. For us it won't be much, we're used to it, but you're vulnerable. You might be crushed against the rocks. It all depends on your concentration, on your will to overcome this obstacle. We'll take you in tow. Go forward, said the Leader to the younger one!

And then I saw how the lad threw himself in the hole against the current. The whirlwind was so strong that I couldn't see how I will be able to pass it.