In Another Life

Chapter 5

"No smile today, Doc? What's wrong?"

He was gazing at her in genuine concern. Harley didn't try to conceal the fact that she had been crying. She had received a phone call this morning from her mother. It had been bad news.

"It's...nothing," she murmured. "Nothing to do with our sessions, so I'll try not to let it bother me."

"It does bother you, though," he murmured. "Tell me, sweets. Please."

She stared at him, and nodded slowly. "My...um...father died this morning," she whispered, tears coming to her eyes again.

"I'm sorry," he replied, sincerely.

"I didn't get to say goodbye to him," she whispered. "Not properly...the last time we spoke we...we had a fight. I'll have to live with that for the rest of my life. With that regret..."

"It's no good having regrets, kid," murmured Joker. "You can't change the past, so just don't think about it. I know I don't."

"You can't," she replied, managing a grin. "For the rest of us, the past is like...like a chain you can never escape, that weighs you down and keeps you prisoner. Regret, fear, disappointment, loss, it all piles up until you can't move anymore..."

"Aw, c'mon, kid, you're strong enough to break that chain," he replied, grinning. "You've had to fight your whole life to get where you are. Don't give up the fight now."

She wiped away her tears, but they kept coming. "My father loved me," she murmured. "But he never said it, y'know? I mean, I knew he did, so he didn't need to say it. He loved me the way all parents love their kids. It wasn't a choice - it was his duty. I don't think he would ever have made the choice to love me. I don't know why anyone would."

"Sometimes love ain't a choice, sweets," he replied. "Sometimes it's just an overwhelming, uncontrollable urge. A kind of insanity, y'know?"

"You remember loving people?" she asked, quietly.

He shook his head. "Nah. I've just been watching a lotta soaps lately. There's nothing else on TV in the daytime."

She laughed, despite herself, then stared at the floor, crying silently. "You see, he's dead now," she whispered. "And I never made him proud of me. That was all I wanted, that's why I did all this, that's why I worked hard, and gave up everything, for my dad to be proud of me. And now he never will..."

At that moment, Joker seized her face in his hands and shoved his mouth onto hers, kissing her passionately. Harley was too stunned to respond, until he drew away and whispered, "Daddy is proud of you, kid."

Harley stared at him. That kiss had awakened such new and exciting sensations, which nevertheless seemed familiar and comforting. It felt like a dream had suddenly come true. It felt like she was coming home.

She thrust her mouth onto his, needing that feeling again. It grew as they continued to kiss. Harley felt herself coming alive, felt something that she had suppressed for a long time returning, strong and warm and good. So good.

He pressed her down onto the sofa, climbing on top of her, his hands roaming her body and unbuttoning her blouse. This was thrilling and new, but it seemed as if she had experienced it before, somehow, even if it was only in her mind. It was perfect.

"Oh...Mr. Joker!" she gasped. "Mr. Joker, we can't do this!"

She made no move to stop him, however, and clutched him harder against her, kissing his face wildly and giving free reign to passions she had long tried to control.

"This is wrong," she continued. "This is wrong and dirty and...oh, Mr. J!" she gasped. "Oh, Mr. J, punish me! I'm such a bad girl!"

He laughed, his beautiful, intoxicating laugh. "You sure are, sweets," he growled. "Might have to give you a spanking."

She had heard that before too, somewhere. It was as if everything in her life had been building up to this moment, this perfect moment. If she was fated to be bad, she would be as bad as they came. As long as she had her Mr. J with her to make things right, who cared if the world thought it was wrong? She didn't anymore. She didn't care about anything else but him.

"I love you, Mr. J," she whispered.

He chuckled. "And I love you, Harley," he murmured in her ear.

And that was all she needed to hear.

The End