A Break?

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June 16th, 2017
Jacob

I woke up with a head ache. Faith is right, I should let Ashley go. I really love her and it's gonna be tough for me but I got do what I got to do. I mean, she's been gone for 2 years so I might as well let her go.

I sighed at my thoughts and sat up. I rubbed my face and looked around to see if Faith was laying by me but she wasn't. I climbed out of bed and walked to the restroom to take a nice hot shower. It was 6:45 and I leave for work at 7:15.

I really dont like working with these bad ass children but thats my job. I turned on the shower, making sure it was hot.

I should just let Ashley go. Faith just doesn't understand the pain that I go through every time I think of her. She died in my arms and it hurt me like hell. I just don't know how to feel about this.

I washed off, turning the water off, getting out afterwards. I got dressed and walked downstairs, seeing Faith cooking.

"Good morning Faith." I hugged her from behind, pecking her on the cheek.

"Good morning baby." She gave a warm smile and continued to cook. I sighed. I dont know how to say this but here I go.

"So," she say turning towards me. "I've been thinking lately. I think we sh-" I cut her off.

"I've been thinking too. I thought about what you said last night and I should let her go. She's gone and I won't see her again. Its been two years and I'm still stuck on some one who's long gone. I should not be crying over her even though she died in my arms. Im with you now and I will be committed to not only you, but our marriage." I managed to say.

Her smile faded which worried me. She looked at me in my eyes.

"About that... I think we should have a break," she focused back on the food.

"You've been thinking way too hard of someone who isn't here that you're not paying any attention to your own wife. Jacob, I know you're trying but you're not trying hard enough. I'll give you some time to think and get your mind together." After she finished, she grabbed two plates out the cabinet.

"But Faith, I thought and I'm finally going to let her go. I need your company to help me. If your not here, then im nothing and I won't be able to stop thinking about Ashley. I need your sympathy right now and your not showing any. I need you to be there with me. I'll take off of work to spend my time with you. I need you to help me through this, Faith. I WILL forget about her. You're the only person I have. The only thing I got. I need you. I love you."

She puts the food on the plate, trying her best to not care about what I said.

"Look, a whole speech is not going to change the fact that we need a break. You need to get your mind straight and I'm giving you the time to do this... I need you and love you too but its for the good. And you shouldn't take off of work for me. And although you say this, its going to be the same shit over and over. You're gonna start thinking of Ashley and not pay attention to a thing I have to say. So just take this opportunity to relax and clear your mind from Ashley and 6 months from now, we'll start seeing each other again. How's that?"

"You know I cant wait that long. Thats half a year and I cant bare to not see your face." I rubbed my hands through my hair and sighed. She can't be serious right now. 6 months of not seeing her face will not help anything. I'll have two people to think about and a lot of other shit too. I just cant stand the thought of her not being by my side through this all.

"Our break starts as soon as you leave for work. I won't be here by time you get home tonight, Jacob. I'll be gone. So just know that our break is in process. I'll see you on December 17th."

She finished. She sat the food on the table and she began to eat. I picked over my food, thinking about everything she just said.

My stomach rumbled so I decided to eat. It was pretty good but I had to go. I gave Faith my last kisses before we went on our little break and left.

Why would she give me time to think through

A Break?

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