My Rant Book (SPORADIC UPDATES)

Among other things

I feel like I owe some of you an explanation.

If you have read my intro in this book, you will know that I suffered from depression. Well, my parents found out a while ago, and I went to a therapist. I had a total of 3 sessions before I figured out how to suppress depression in a healthy way.

But the funny thing about depression with me is that it is still there. Sometimes I get little flashes of it, and other times I feel it in the back of my mind, and others its a trigger.

A trigger made me feel like I owed you this explanation. Yes there's only a few who read my work compared to what you see on the discover page, but it made me feel accomplished. That people liked my work.

Anyway, this trigger was the most recent jacksepticeye video, in which he plays the game "The Beginners Guide." Usually, YouTube videos bring me up, and help shove depression down, but this game that jack was playing was about the mind of a depressed person. Now, why didn't I just leave the page when I saw what it was about? I was connected. I related to the story, and this game hit home for me. I highly recommend you watch it.

Anyway, for my explanation.

I try to create. Just a week ago, I tried to continue Fire Girl, the book that has the most reads on my account. I got 3 words in before I just said "whats the point?"

I get these ideas, and they seem great. I know what I want, how I want it, and most of the time what I need to get there. But lately, they just leave.

I still know these ideas. I have a small clue as to where I was going with Fire Girl. My problem is that these ideas lose their novelty, I guess. I lose the determination to finish the story. The only story I ever finished is an old hunger games fanfic called Habits and Games I wrote maybe 4 years ago, and I deleted it because it was terrible and no one read it.

So, I guess my point here is that I need my determination back. Until then, I don't know if I will ever update.

Love you all. Thanks for taking the time to read my work.