All the Waters of the Earth

Chapter 10: The Best Interest of the Child

"Lucy, how are you?" she asked warmly, shaking my hand. Then she looked Jake up and down and looked back at me, confused. "I didn't know you knew Jake."

"He's, uh," I started.

"We're neighbors," he interrupted. "Until I get my remodel done."

"Oh," said Amelia brightly.

"I'll let you be," said Jake, and he hustled out.

What was up with him? After we had such a perfect weekend, why was he being such a jerk?

Amelia sat down at the table and I tried to arrange my thoughts so that I was thinking about the court proceeding, but I was really wondering why on earth Jake acted so badly. She pulled out a file.

"I reviewed the petition that you dropped off last week, and it looks like Mr. Castro is seeking to have greater custody of Roberto. The proportion of time that he is requesting is such that given your incomes, he would not have to pay any child support."

"I just can't believe this," I whispered, indignant. To hear it out loud from another person made it seem real. Before, just reading the words, made it seem like it was a story, not my real life. And then to my horror, tears started welling in my eyes. I never cried. But apparently, I was going to now. And I found myself spilling my guts to Amelia. I think that being served with the papers was the start, but Jake acting so weird was the trigger and I couldn't take it anymore.

"Carlos dated me for three months in high school, until he talked me into having sex with him, and he got me pregnant the first time we did it. In his Toyota Camry. Not very romantic. And then he dumped me for another girl, who was a cheerleader." I wiped at the tears streaming down my face. Amelia handed me a Kleenex.

"I felt like complete shit. He just used me to get off his teenage hormones and then once I said yes, he was on to the next. But I was young and stupid and I didn't use any protection. So a few weeks later, when I started feeling weird and realized that I missed my period, I was like, no. My stomach dropped. I couldn't be pregnant. My parents would kill me.

"So yes, I was pregnant with Roberto, and was Carlos there at all during my pregnancy? No. He had moved on to a girl on the dance team. And was he there when I was in labor? No. He had moved on to a girl who used to sit next to me in math class. And did Carlos come to see his child? Not until he was a month old. And that was only because I went over to his house and pounded on his door, demanding that he meet him."

I started sobbing, all of the old thoughts of the past coming to me now, and I was reliving them.

"I was abandoned. Carlos left me by myself, all those pregnancy hormones, all those feelings, all those changes. He didn't care. And I couldn't make him care. But it scarred me. That bastard hurt me and now he's doing it again. He doesn't care about anyone except himself.

"So was it too early for me to have Roberto? Absolutely. Do I love him with all of my heart? That and more. But he's my child. Carlos didn't do anything. I had to chase him for child support. I was trying to get my GED, to finish up my high school degree, and then I was trying to go to community college. I lived with my parents. I worked at Taco Bell. I did anything just to get an education and to get money for my kid because there was no way in hell I was going to be another unwed, Hispanic single mother. And yet, that was exactly what I am.

"I knew that I wanted to be a writer and in between everything, in between school and studying, in between work and trying to make money, and in between taking care of my son, I wrote. I wrote in the middle of the night. I wrote because I had to. And I've managed to make a living out of it, but it was through a lot of hard work, and I need Carlos to pay the damn child support and leave us alone. He doesn't want to be around us anyway.