Don't tell me nonsense

reacquainted

The gel was a transparent colour and really cold, it felt awkward. I was lying on my back trying to see what the doctor was doing while straining my neck in the process.

"Relax." I inhaled slowly staying in the same position I was in being the stubborn person that I am.

"Okay Dr David, but you better tell me when you can see the baby." I dropped my head down on the bed and groaned as my head met the bed; it was not a cushioned landing. My doctor laughed and told me to take it easy, easier said than done; I was looked like a bloated panda.

"Okay so this is the baby's head," I was so quiet and attentive as I was watching my first child on the ultra-scan.

"Mhhmm." I was so interested; the doctor showed me its limbs and everything and let's not forgets the sex of the baby. I was five months now and had already sat a couple exams, I didn't have the time to come for my four month check up with all the revision so this was the most suitable date; a Saturday. The doctor wiped the gel of my belly and I was free to go, I had to go and pick up my prenatal vitamins. Hurrying out of the room, I called Jr to tell him the sex of the baby- he didn't pick up; I guess he'll have to wait then.

Now I was on route for the library to study with the chickas for my last few exams because I sat a few the year before, so I did not have as many exams as everyone else, thank God. Now all I had to do was ace my history exams and wait for my bubba to pop out. I reached the prescription that I dropped on the floor and then it took to the wind. Oh my Lord I was so angry, what am I doing trying to catch a flying piece of paper. Eventually, I gave up tired and hungry.

"Here you are Miss." I just breathed a sigh of relief; it would be embarrassing explaining to my doctor how my prescription flew away.

"Thank you so much," I turned to face the person who was chuckling ferociously. It was Jermaine; I walked off ever so quickly, but it being Jermaine it was not over. I thought I was walking fast and I was out of reach when an arm held me by my arm and spun me around.

"Esther," I threw my hands up in defeat as I knew there was no point in lying or acting up, I mean he did save me from some embarrassment.

"That's me," I gave him my 'ta dah/jazz' hands.

"I aint seen you in the longest, I missed you ya'know." I shook my hand in his face as he hit the sentimental bull.

"Na na na, don't start that because I don't want to hear that," like honestly I've been heartbroken too much because of this one boy and it's just little things so what happens when it gets into big things. Let me tell you what happens, nothing because it will never get there; of now I am in a firm head space and I know what I want for myself and no boy is going to give me that, so I'm just going to stick to what I know is good for me, that education.

"come now b, don't do that I been thinking about you ever since I saw you that day at college and you just went off on man in front of his peers and all." Smiling at the memory I gave an insincere nod. I had my reasons for what I did, so I don't give a damn how he's feeling let him feel how I felt when I saw him with some other female when he's talking about 'yeah, I do love you', come on now. I must have something stuck on my forehead saying: 'mug or dick'ed' because that what these people have reduced me to over the course of these of these few months- first Jermaine and then Timothy who next Bobby Brown, nah not me. From now on the ball is in my playing field, I'm taking some control.

"How about you stop playing the victim and ask why?" I put my hand on my chin looking around like I was thinking, "Oh, oh that's right because you don't want to know why, well I saw you at Westfield on the 14th with some other female, what happened to I love you, na bro." this was actually so funny because he had to think back to the 14th was and when he realised you could see the change in his facial expression, his body language- just him in general. Boys think they're so slick with they're 'baby girl's' that make you feel that tingle down your spine making you feel special, they're 'I got you's' that make you feel like you're the only one and the 'I love you's' that make you think that you feel valued and like you actually matter even if it is only to that person. Only to find out that there are others that get the same 'special' treatment.