Conversations With Ana

10

She sighed again: "Ana."

I raised an eyebrow in response, waiting for her to continue.

"I just want to help you. But I can't help you if you won't talk to me."

"I don't need help."

"You tried to kill yourself."

"That wasn't me."

"Who was it then?"

I froze, realizing my mistake.

I had slipped up.

Both me and the girl sitting on the couch next to me could tell that I had made a mistake.

An accident, Kylie said, you were supposed to tell everyone it was an accident.

I cleared my throat and diverted my eyes to one of the drawings hung up on the wall.

"Ana. Who was it if it wasn't you?"

I did the only thing I could do.

One of the things I was very good at.

Probably best at.

I lied: "I don't know. I didn't feel right that night. " 

She didn't make me elaborate, to which Kylie and I sighed in relief.

Kylie had recently become a permanent fixture in my life.

She was always just there.

I didn't like her much, still.

She still scared me and made me uneasy, but I let her stay around.

She scared the others away and she also advised me on things.

She was there to help me get out, she promised.

And I believed her.

She was kind enough, unlike the other hallucinations, who had been strangely absent.

Though, I wasn't complaining.

Dr. Adren typed some things into her tablet before looking up and giving me The Look.

I stared back at her, wondering what she was trying to draw out of me now.

The rest of the session was like that.

Us staring at each other in silence.

Once the hour was up, I stood up and make a quick exit.

I speed walked towards the sliding glass doors that lead outside.

I needed some clean air.

I was barely paying attention.

Which was probably the reason for me slamming into Gordon.

Unbalanced and very much uncoordinated, I fell, hitting the floor hard, pain spreading through my backside.

"Hey! Watch it you walking tree!"

I expected Gordon to snap back at me, but he didn't.

Instead, he stared down at me.

His stare was much more intense and unnerving than Dr. Arden.

I squirmed underneath his gaze.

"Gordon? Are you okay?"

I stood up, frowning.

He still stared at me and it was only then that I took him in fully.

He had dark circles under his eyes, a stark contrast compared to his pale skin.