wake up, phil - [phan]

{ 1 } - The Promise

{4 HOURS EARLIER}

Dan's POV

I was sat next to Phil in the black taxi, staring out the window, my vision blurring as I lost focus and the streetlights all smudged into one. My thoughts were a muddle of excitement and relief that I was finally going to be able to see my parents again, after months of not seeing them. I had missed them a lot.

I watched the streets flitting by as we drove through the city, passing through traffic and hearing the occasional hoot of an angry driver. I was lost in my own thoughts until Phil nudged me in the ribs, making me jump out of my skin.

"Are you excited for tonight?" He asked, after laughing at my reaction to him breaking me out of my thoughts. He knew me too well, he knew I liked to be thoughtful once in a while.

"Yeah," I replied. "It'll be nice to see my parents again. I haven't seen them for so long now."

Phil was silent for a moment before speaking again, his voice tender and soothing, his eyes glistening in the passing street lamps that briefly lit up the taxi every few seconds. He placed his cool, smooth hand on mine that was sat in lap, on top of my phone.

"I'm excited to see them again too. They seem to almost like me," he grinned sadly and looked away from me.

"How could anyone hate you?" I smiled at him as he turn back to face me.

"Dan, you know how much I was hated at school."

"Philll... That was years ago, and you know I was bullied badly too. If only we'd gone to the same school, we could've stood up for each other. That's in the past anyway. Aaand, think of all the millions of people who love you and would kill to meet you now, who watch your videos and admire you and look up to you for who you are."

"You mean our audience?"

"Yep."

"Yeah, but even then, they still like you more than me. You have so many more viewers and subscribers than me. The amount of times we've been stopped by our viewers in the street, and then it turns out they only know or like you. And the amount of times you've been told you're young and attractive and I'm just old and ugly."

"Oh god, Phil. We've discussed this before. Most of my audience just sub to me because they think I'm hot, or whatever... Whereas your audience watch you because they love your personality and opinions and... I guess your audience are more sincere then mine. And you're not so bad looking yourself."

"You know it." Phil smirked and then laughed at his attempt to pull a seductive face. He sighed happily and rested his head on my shoulder.

"Also, Dan?" He muttered, sitting upright.

"Yeah, Phil?"

"Dan, I need to ask you. Are... Are you... Are you ready to tell... Y'know..." He looked away, his tone sounding slightly embarrassed.

"What?" I looked at Phil, noticing the anxiety in his eyes.

"Are you ready for us to tell your parents?"

"Tell them what?" I stared at Phil blankly.

"C'mon, Dan, you know what I'm asking."

"No, I really don't." I frowned.

"Are you ready to tell your parents that we're... Together? As a couple?"

The question caught me off guard.

"I... Phil, I don't know... I mean..." I stuttered, then looked at Phil sheepishly. "No, Phil, not now. It's far too soon..." I began to panic, wondering what unimaginable things would happen if my homophobic parents found out about my secret relationship with Phil. They'd hate me forever, they'd always had very strong views against people of a different sexuality preference to theirs. I grabbed Phil's hand tightly and turned my face towards his.

"No, Phil, they mustn't find out yet... Not now, it's too early... Phil imagine if..." Panic flooded my voice, and my hands started shaking as I struggled to get the words out of my mouth.

Phil grabbed my hands and pressed them together. His hands were cool and soft, soothing my jumpy, sweaty ones immediately. My heart slowed slightly as I attempted to calm myself.

"Okay, okay, calm down, you're shaking like a leaf! It's fine Dan, everything will be okay... You can trust me. They won't find out until you're ready to let them find out." Phil took my face in his hands and looked me right in the eye. "I just wanted to know if we could tell them, and stop lying to them. I hate lying and hiding things from people. But, if you're not ready to tell them, they won't know a thing.

I promise."

I leant in to kiss his cheek but pulled away quickly. It was a reflex action; don't do anything romantic with each other in case somebody from the internet recognises our faces. Nonetheless, I looked down and wrap my hands around his.

"Thank you, Phil."