100 Reasons Why Twilight and Vampires Are Stupid!
1. Bella is too predictable.
2. Why would anyone want to write about a character as dull and unchanging as Edward??
3. Too many grammatical and spelling errors.
4. Abuse of the word "chagrin".
5. Meyer makes up Alice and Jasper and everyone, but then it seems like she forgot about them!
6. When Edward left in New Moon, he should've stayed gone!
7. Edward's perfection is described too many times. We get it. He's hot!
8. Bella gets embarrassed too much. It's annoying.
9. Bella is always saved by Edward. It gets boring.
10. Yes Edward, we know she smells good. Get over it.
11. Superpowers are overrated.
12. Vampires and werewolves... What about demons??? Oh wait. They're the same thing... :)
13. If vampires don't have souls, how do they have emotion? GLITCH!
14. Edward's way too old for Bella.
15. Face it, homicidal fans. Edward isn't real and if he were, he wouldn't even notice you. He'd be too busy loving "perfect Bella".
16. Meyer ruined the whole series by making movies with all the wrong actors. I mean, seriously. Robert's head is square, jasper's hair looks like Einstein's, and Rosalie is nice!! What the heck??
17. In the movie, Bella sounds like a man. And she has a twitch when she talks. And she shows no emotion. And she's too accepting of the fact that ugly Edward wants to suck her blood.
18. Bella's life completely revolves around Edward. How stupid can she be??
19. If Edward loves her, why does he abuse her?
20. They're relationship is like Rihanna and Chris Brown's. Except Bella would never take it to court. And both Rihanna and Chris are hotter than Edward and Bella.
21. He's way too possessive! It reminds me of Gollum and The Ring... except Gollum's cooler than Edward... and The Ring is prettier than Bella...
22. Bella attempts suicide. Does that sound like a healthy relationship to you?
23. Isn't it a teensy bit creepy that Edward watches her sleep? If I were her, (I don't want to be) I would be running for the hills screaming "STALKER!!!!" at the top of my lungs. But does she do that? No. She just says "Did you hear my sleeptalk?"
24. A real vampire wouldn't be so moral. That's just wrong.
25. Love at first sight? Naw, how about love at first smell?
26. He only loves her because she smells good. Yummm...
27. Bella's messed up! She saw Victoria beheaded and she was fine! Me? I'd die right then and there.
28. The plot is unending!!!
29. I think Meyer just wrote the last book for the money. I bet she's happy now, isn't she?
30. What about Mike?? Poor guy didn't have a chance compared to "perfectly toned chest" Eddie.
31. What kind of a name is Edward? (No offense to any Edwards out there. It's just too... common??)
32. James should've lived.
33. Victoria should've lived.
34. Dr. Seuss's books were better written. And that's the truth!