My Michelle.- Complete Story!

Chapter 21 - Separation

"Mr. McCartney?"

A whispered voice gained his attention. He looked towards the door to see the same doctor who had come to the house. He stood up and walked wearily towards her. Opposite the doorway was another open door. Paul could see an office. She waved him into it.

"I have tea and toast," she said softly, "I thought you might be in need of something."

He looked doubtfully back into the room where Michelle was sleeping. "I can't....."

"Michelle will sleep for hours yet Mr. McCartney. And if she stirs, we'll hear her as her room is monitored 24 hours a day."

He reluctantly followed the doctor into the small office. On the doctor's desk stood a small screen, like a television. On the screen he could see that a camera was trained on to where Michelle was sleeping. Noticing his surprise, the doctor spoke again.

"When patients are first referred to us, particularly in an emergency situation such as tonight, the room is continuously monitored. Not just by me, although this is why my office is so close, but also by the three members of the security team who helped us before. It is for the patient's own safety. Self harming and making comments about wanting to be dead are never ignored." She poured tea, passed a cup to Paul then offered him some toast on a plate. "Now then Mr. McCartney," she said calmly, "I was hoping you were feeling up to telling me about  what has happened for Michelle to end up in this state. It would be a good chance to do it whilst she is sleeping."

He took a sip of his tea. It was hot and strong. "First things first though," he said with a small smile, "Call me Paul. Somehow I feel we're going to be doing a lot of talking over the next few weeks!"

Thank you, I'm Helen. Right, can you describe to me what has happened so I can get a picture of why Michelle is in this state?"

Paul began by describing how he and Michelle had met and quickly become an item. He explained the unexpected pregnancy but how excited they both were about it. He paused, unwilling to relive the memories. "I received a phone call when I was in Australia. I was needed to be with Michelle and that there had been complications with the pregnancy. I wasn't told anything until I arrived at the hospital." He stopped, fighting back tears, he struggled to continue. "Michelle had given birth without me....early."

"How early?"

"Ten weeks .... a little girl whom we called Jessica. She was stillborn."

"I'm so sorry...."

"I was completely lost in what I was supposed to say or do after that. Michelle was completely shattered yet all she was bothered about was me and how I felt. It made me feel incredibly guilty. I even thought for a while that had not been on the tour and I would have been with Michelle then maybe our baby could have lived. I know this isn't the case but...." He shrugged.

"When did Michelle start to show signs of the behaviour I saw tonight."

"She was discharged from hospital after a few days. The birth had been straight forward so there was no need to stay in. When she came home she seemed to be coping. We talked about Jess and how we felt. We cried a lot and shared our grief. We had photos of her the hospital had taken .....we both seemed to be helping each other.

Two weeks or so after this I was forced to make a statement to the press. They wanted to know why I had left the tour and were coming up with all sorts of rubbish. Michelle and I were being harassed at home but so were the other band members. I arranged to make a press statement, which I did around 4pm this evening. Michelle wanted to be with me when I did it. It went OK then as we were returning into the house, someone in the crowd called her name, she turned. They said something and she just crumbled."