My Michelle.- Complete Story!

Chapter 20 - Heartbreak.

"Michelle," the voice called again, "How does it feel to know you deprived Paul of being a father? Do you think he'll still marry now you're not pregnant and can't give him the baby he wants? How does it feel to know he could replace you with any woman he wants who can have a child for him?"

A cloud of silence smothered the crowd. Michelle stared at the person asking the question. Paul watched as she crumpled to the floor as if in slow motion. She lay in a dead faint. He rushed to her, picked her up and took her back into the house. Rose rushed to him.

"Phone an ambulance quick!"

He laid Michelle on the sofa and gently called her name. Slowly her eyes opened. Paul heaved a sigh of relief and held her hand. "Just relax," he said softly, "the ambulance will be here soon."

After being examined by a doctor in A and E Michelle was declared well despite fainting and allowed to go home. She remained quiet, almost subdued which concerned Paul greatly. After she decided she wanted to go to bed, he waited until he was sure she was sleep before he left her alone. A few hours later he made his own way to bed, but was shocked to find Michelle was no longer there. He called her and searched the other bedrooms. Finally he found her, sitting in the dark in the room she had started to decorate a nursery.

"Michelle," he whispered softly shaking her shoulder. She stirred from her sleep, lifting a tear stained face to him. "What are you doing?"

"I need to be here," she whispered, "I need to think." She began to cry, deep heart breaking sobs. "I'm sorry I failed you Paul. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She grabbed him suddenly, panic rising in her voice, "Forgive me please, forgive me!"

He held her close to him. "You haven't failed anything Michelle. It was just something that happened. Jane explained how no one was to blame."

"I failed you, I let you down! I don't deserve your love!"

Paul was confused, alarmed at the things Michelle was saying. "Come on love, let's go back to bed. Everything we feel better tomorrow."

"No...I need to be here. I need to feel Jess with me but I can't! Why can't I remember her, or feel her with me anymore. No wonder I lost her. I  don't deserve to be a mother if I've forgotten her already! I'm a failure!" She began to claw at her face and pulling her hair. "I hate myself. You must hate me too."

Her distress grew. Paul watched, becoming increasingly alarmed as Michelle became more and more hysterical, hurting herself more and more. "Rose! Rose!" he called from the top of the stairs. "Rose, ring Richard. Quickly!"

Rose raced upstairs to where he was. She took one look at Michelle and her distress then picked up the phone and dialed the number. Passing the phone to Paul, he explained what was happening.  Richard arrived swiftly and climbed the stairs two at a time. He looked at Michelle in horror. Her face was scratched and she was huddled in a corner of the room, holding a small teddy bear Paul had bought when she was first pregnant, rocking and sobbing.

"What happened?" He whispered.

"A reporter made a comment about her and she's just gone to pieces. Richard, what's wrong with her?"

Richard moved closer to Michelle. "Michelle, sweetheart." His voice was calm and soothing. "Michelle, talk to me!"

Continuing to rock and sob, she looked through him. Her eyes filled with pain. Richard tried to put his arms around her and hold her. Still she sobbed and she began to pull away from him. She scrambled further in to the corner of the room and began screaming at him not to touch her. Paul watched, terrified. 

"Richard, what's happening?"

"What did this person say to her Paul? Outside."

"Something about being a failure because we lost Jess and that I wouldn't need to marry her any more."