What if...

Chapter four

"You keep talking to her, great, what are you going to get out of this? What's the next step from here?" His voice was low but Han could hear his elders' heart behind his words, "Are you going to tell her who you are and trust she doesn't leak it to the world?"

Han stared down at his lap while slumping back in the rolling chair, his feet pressed firmly on the ground to make sure he doesn't move anywhere. He knows where Chan is coming from and knows there's no ill intent; he's asking questions he's been asking himself. "What if she likes me for me and not because I'm part of her favorite Kpop group?"

"Okay, let's go that route," Chan took a quick sip of water, while Changbin extended his legs out while crossing his arms, eyeing the both of them. "What if you do tell her, she thinks it's so cool and she's very calm about everything. You ask her to be your girlfriend? You want to date her, she comes here, the 'fans' find out, threatens you but mostly her. She can't live like that, so she breaks up with you and flies back home leaving you here heart broken."

The picture Chan created made Han's heart crash back down, making him realize fans, not the actual Stays, will go after you. He didn't really take in account of that being a possibility since his mind was high in the clouds, the best outcomes were more delightful. 

"Or," Chan continued with the different directions this relationship with you could lead, "You tell her, she's could be one our 'fans', tells the whole world she's been talking to you, now we, the company, have to explain everything. Or even the next horrible possibility - fans somehow finding out before you tell her..."

All the possibilities made Han groan in agony as he slipped from the chair to the floor with his hands covering his eyes, wishing there was a better solution but also wishing his heart didn't fall for you. He could feel his head thump with pain and in frustration. "I could protect her from the fans," he tried to desperately convince himself.

"And date in secret? You think she would be up for something like that?" This time it was Changbin's turn to ask.

He opened his eyes, seeing Changbin and Chan staring down at him, wondering if he was okay and what he might do. "We are not saying this out of anger or anything we just want to make sure you know all the outcomes because we care so much about you, we don't want you hurt and this and we know you don't want her hurt in any of this either, " Chan said in a light tone, feeling bad because he didn't want Han's heart/spirit crushed. He cares for him a lot and that's one of the reasons he wants to make sure he knows what Han is getting himself into.

"I understand...but I need to go for a walk..."

"Do you want us to come with you?" Changbin wondered, worried for his friend, his brother.

"No, I want to be alone right now." After getting up, he fixed his clothes, grabbed his bag and exit Chan's office and then the building. His heart and brain were torn, thinking over the many outcomes his friends both proposed.

As he walked home, having to endure lovely couples walking by, 'see that could be me and Y/n but what if she doesn't want that....'  He kept thinking while on his way to a bench at a park, hoping he would find some sort of solution. After sitting down, he held his head in his hands, closing his eyes. 'We would flirt but that doesn't mean she likes me? Or what if  I do tell her, will she only would see me as an idol?'  

A tired sigh escaped before titling his head up and looking up to the night sky, to the bright moon shinning down. He asked the moon if she had any idea what he could do. "Should I just stop talking to her altogether?"  'I could just avoid of this, maybe it would be easier...'