Discovering a 'Tist

Chapter 1

Ash could feel the induction working its magic almost immediately. The cadence of the voice partnered with the training and triggers he'd given himself sent his head spiraling softly into the pillows beneath him, and before Ash had even realized it, he was swimming in a deep ocean of thick black pleasure. It felt like seconds dragged into hours, and the murmuring sounds of Mesmer's voice slipped in and around his conscious mind. Ash thought for a moment he heard the voice in his ears say something about forgetting, but then he remembered that he didn't have any thoughts when listening to Mister Mesmer, and he sank all the further into the serene darkness.

He couldn't say how long he was down for, and something about the fille was different in the ending. Ash felt a momentary sense of awareness that faded quickly as gentle light shone into his eyes. He wasn't sure what was happening, as this file didn't end with the same usual waking command, until he suddenly felt himself bubbling up out of trance and looking directly at his phone screen. His fingers hit send.

Confusion and fog addled his brain as Ash looked up and around and then back down at his phone to piece together the giant gaps of information that seemed to have disappeared from the past several minutes. His phone was open to his email app, and apparently he had just sent a message to an email he'd never seen or heard of before. He had just sent an email to Mister.mesmer90@gmail.com with the subject line "Trance subject" and a brief message below it.

"I am agood trance subject for you mistermesmer I obey and forget likke a good subject doees."

A mortified expression fell across Ash's face as he read the email he'd sent. Panic swept through him as thoughts that he'd just doxed himself and exposed this perverted fantasy he'd explored in private with seemingly the whole world.

Then he caught himself before he spiraled any further. The email he'd sent the message from wasn't a work or school email, just his own personal gmail, and he hadn't revealed any information of any kind. He quickly scrolled back through his sent messages to be certain that that was the only message he'd sent, and sure enough it was. His heart was still racing in his chest but he let out a sigh of relief. He hadn't really doxed himself, other than giving away an email that was already full to bursting with daily spam, and all the message really proved was that he'd listened to one of Mister Mesmers files.

He considered deleting the message, but it was already sent so it would just be erasing evidence from his end, and given that he lived alone, there wasn't really any risk of someone else finding out. Maybe if someone at his college took his computer and for some reason searched through his sent emails they would see this, but the odds of that felt next to nothing. His whole body started to relax and Ash chuckled to himself at the "surprise" the file had promised him. It had certainly been exhilarating, to say the least. Ash decided then no harm-no foul, and went to bed feeling very relieved and somewhat excited over this scandalous action he'd taken. It didn't really mean anything, and he doubted anything would come of it.

The next morning Ash awoke to an email notification from his gmail from Mister.mesmer@gmail.com. The title? "Good Subject". He bolted upright and opened his phone to the message immediately.

"Thank you for messaging me like a good subject, I'm glad you enjoyed the file I created, and that it had the intended effect. Let me know if you have any other thoughts or questions about my work. I love engaging with fan feedback

-Mesmer"

He looked over the message, his heart once again racing, worried at first he may have accidentally joined some cult. But as he read over the brief response again, it honestly seemed more like an author responding to fan mail more than anything else. It felt so strange to "talk to" directly the source of the voice he'd been listening to over the past several months. This wasn't a file or meditation, not some prepared piece of work created for an audience to perceive. It was just a message between two people. Ash was intrigued, and decided to email back some of his "thoughts and questions".