If I Can Love You, Why Can't You? - A Werewolf Novel

If I Can Love You, Why Can't You? - Chp 22 [True Love]

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After I was let out I was bombarded by the girls, both of them gushing with worry. I was told dad had been called and he told the nurse to tell me he’d be back home tonight or tomorrow morning earl as he’d left to visit family friends while I was away. The family friends a long distance from home.

The ride home was silent as I slept or pretended to sleep the whole way home. That whole car drive home I clung to Logan’s business card. Logan in a real depressing way was all I had. The girls and dad were oblivious to the reality of the scenario; they all just thought I was hurt by the explosion caused by gas leak or some lie. Mum was called and the nurse had no message to relay; typical. Adam was probably oblivious and honestly I didn’t want to call him.

And there was Will. I was keeping myself together, so well, fighting back every thought and evidence that told me he wanted nothing to do with me. Little contact, Erin, his lack of detail of what he is discovering in research and his and Erin’s past, missing my birthday party and also forgetting, setting babysitters on me and then getting angry with me. Than last of all was myself waking up alone it a hospital miles from home nearly dying and having heard nothing. I presumed that he’d have to know; the girls, Logan, dad, anyone of them could have told them. Yet I heard nothing. It was pretty obvious this soul mate stuff was rubbish and when he says “I love you.” It’s total bull. It hurt like hell, he’d hurt me so much and yet he couldn’t make it better. Maybe it was beyond reparable.

Logan was all I had, practically a stranger. And as we drove home I prayed with all that I had left that at least he could keep me safe.

♥

Getting home that night I walked up the steps saying little to the girls except goodnight and that I just wanted to be left alone. Keeping Logan’s card in my pocket, having memorized the number as it sat next to my mobile, I walked around the house feeling stiff and sore as I locked all doors and windows. I had already checked a mirror back at the hospital that showed a battered girl. My wrist was tapped, a cut with stitches on my cheek and bruises covering my skin the rest of my bones stiff and sore. Chucking my bags at the kitchen door I turned on the outside light and walked down the front steps and path to the mail box getting a couples day worth of mail out and carrying them inside.

Reaching the steps I could feel the change around my body and I could feel his presence, my body instantly reacting and betraying me. I froze on the top step. Closing my eyes I counted to five before turning around. My body burned for him to hold me, to kill all these dark fears and doubts within me. To love me. Yet I knew he didn’t want to, if he loved he’d have been there.

His eyes lit in utter shock as he saw my face, cuts covering my face especially the deep one. “Tanze what happened to you?” he breathed beyond shocked.

I wondered how he knew I was home, had the girls called him finally telling him? Or had Logan called and explained finally as he had said he was going to?

I swallowed back a sob and narrowed my eyes “I could ask you the same thing.” I didn’t yell it but my tone was enough to make hurt fill his eyes as he recoiled as if I’d struck him.

“Okay so maybe I’ve been awful, terri-“

“Maybe?!” I cried “I woke up in a hospital bed this morning alone Will, alone!” my voice breaking as those tears threatened to escape.

Will’s eyes lit up with more shock, pain and even anger “Tanze I-“

“No. I'm sick of this, I really am.” My voice breaking. “So I'm going to do it for you Will since you obviously don’t have the balls to do it yourself.” I ignored how his eyes pleaded with mine, how he took a step forward holding out his arms as I took a step back. “We’re done.” I said tears falling as I sobbed shakily. “You can have Erin.” I cracked tasting salt.

And with that I ran inside locking the only door unlocked, the front door, and I slid to the floor broke and crying. Letting all the pain surface and break. Everything I had held in lashing free as I cried hard and loud, it shaking my body.

“Tanze!” he cried pounding on the door desperately.

“Go away!” I cried salt searing my face as I curled in a ball my heart ripped away a long time ago. “You’re good at that.” I whispered.

I knew he heard me because I could hear him fall to the ground; he sat beside the door the whole time as I cried, on the other side of the door. Feeling all my pain, fighting for me.

But it was too late. He was too late.

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