“Max!” her name was whispered desperately, and she snapped awake, jerking herself upright in her bed.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
Alex knelt at the side of her bed, her brown eyes bright.
“She’s here. She’s awake,” she whispered.
Immediately, Max’s mind cleared it’s cobwebs and she stilled.
“Mom?” she whispered. As if raising her voice above a whisper might shatter this fragile dream, this illusion that she so desperately needed.
Alex nodded solemnly.
She whipped the covers back and bolted to the closet. As she tugged sweatpants on over her running shorts, she headed for the door, where Alex had already disappeared.
Downstairs, noises were coming from the kitchen.
She entered warily, and stood still in the doorway.
Her mother was back.
The creature she’d put to bed last night was gone, and her mother was back.
She had hair that was the shorter version of Max’s, cut to her shoulders. She and her youngest daughter shared their brown eyes, and she was awake, and she was dressed properly.
She tapped her fingers to some mystery beat as she watched a pancake on the stove top, and her foot tapped with her.
“Mom?” Max couldn’t help the word slipping from her lips, though she could have slapped herself for it.
She turned to them, her smile sad and happy at the same time.
“Hey,” she said.
Neither Max nor Alex spoke. They were frozen in the doorway to the kitchen, unsure of what to do.
“Sit down, I’m making breakfast,” Lillian said.
Woodenly, Max did so, and Alex followed suit.
Soon, too soon, they fell back into habit. As if the past year had not happened, as if all of those horrible days and nights had faded away.
As if they were happy again.
As if their father’s disappearance hadn’t put their mother into a fog. A fog that she so very rarely came out of.
Alex and their mother chattered about meaningless things, and Max watched them in bemusement.
Occasionally, their mother would tease Max about something, and she’d be forced to roll her eyes and laugh.
And too soon, it was over.
Max checked her watch and winced.
“Mom, I have to go,” she said, regret dripping from her voice.
Alex’s brown eyes pinned her to the wall, but she could not relent.
“Why?” her mother asked in sorrow.
“I have to go to work,” she said.
“Work! That gym is lucky to have you, and you work too hard for them. You’ve got a bruise covering half your face, for Pete’s sakes.”
Her hand went to her jaw and she could’ve slapped herself again for not covering it up before she came down.
“The gym is unbelievably lucky to have me,” Max stooped down to kiss her cheek before straightening, “But they pay me well, so I’ll deal with the bruises.”
She trotted up the stairs and dressed quickly.
As she went down the stairs, she peeked into the living room. Mom and Alex were curled up on the couch together, laughing at something they were watching on the television.
As she lingered in the doorway, her heart hurt from watching them, watching what used to be a normal thing and was now a treasured luxury.
After a moment, she had to look away to get control of herself.
When she was ready, Max stepped into the room and bent over from behind the couch, and kissed both their cheeks.
“I have my phone if you need to call me. Behave, kids,” she said playfully.
“Get out of here,” her mother laughed.
On her way out, Max stopped and crouched by Alex’s end of the couch.
“Alex, I’ll be back by seven tonight, okay?” Max whispered in her ear.
“Like you were back at midnight last night?” she questioned sharply.
“I’m sorry. I ran late. I’ll be back by seven, I promise,” she said.
Alex gave her a long look, then looked at their mother, who was watching the TV with abnormal intensity.
“I just don’t want you to miss her being here,” she said quietly.
Insert knife in heart and twist violently.
“I know, kiddo. But I have work,” she kissed Alex’s forehead. “Seven. I’ll be home.
She left quickly.
