Why Can't There Be Another Way

Chapter 13

That night, while Anitta is sleeping, I start building, whatever it is I plan to build. I've had this plan in mind for a year and a half now, but had no reason to complete it. The concept is simple, though the actual device is complex. I need to build some sort of button to deactivate all the bombs from whatever distance. I don't need to do this, but Coin doesn't need me now that she's got her Mockingjay. Better threaten her to keep me alive and untouched by the Mockingjay and her accomplices than die right now.

It takes three days for me to finish the button, and three days for Coin to summon me. On my way, I pass by the hospital, where I see Finnick Odair fidgeting with a piece of rope. He looks...broken.

"Hello, Finnick," I say, just to be polite.

As soon as he sees me, he looks like he's seen a ghost. Out of all the new arrivals, he knows me, though our meeting was brief. It was at the end of the Tribute Parade, when I met up with all my allies. He was Tsunami's mentor.

"A-thena?" he asks quietly, not quite believing his eyes. "What...how-," he looks at a loss for words. Understandable.

"I'm alive," I confirm. "I escaped the arena. Tsunami didn't kill me. I took out my tracker and blew it up. I ended up on her hovercraft."

Finnick abandoned his piece of rope, and placed his hands on my shoulders, staring at my face. "You're alive," he whispers almost to himself. A realization crosses his features. "Horus. He's doing well. The last time I saw him, he was doing well."

"Thank you," I say. "And I am so sorry about Mags."

His already red eyes seem to be clouding over as more tears threaten to resurface. I feel bad. He blessed me with good news while I just reminded him of the death of his mentor.

"How about I introduce you to Katniss?" he proposes after a while.

"Oh..." I weigh my words carefully. "Yeah, well, you know how she's probably going to kill me because I'm from District 2. Brutus and Enobaria did try to kill her and...yeah. You get my point. Best we stay out of each other's presence for as long as possible."

"Perhaps-" Finnick starts but I cut him off.

"Not now. She's already going to be processing all this. Besides, I've got to go see President Coin."

"Oh, okay."

"We can catch up...er...later," I say awkwardly.

"Yeah, sure," he replies.

As I make my way to President Coin, I feel lighter. I'm so glad to finally see a familiar face. Seeing Finnick gives me hope. However little it is. It just means I'm closer to seeing Horus and Bellona again.

When I sit myself opposite President Coin, I push the hopeful feeling as far back as I can. I've got to have clear thoughts.

"I heard you threatened Soldier Hawthorne by destroying this District," Coin says.

"It was pure bluff," I reply in a neutral tone.

She looks at me carefully. "You're not the type to bluff, Soldier Cadoret."

I hate her precise observations, but I'm like that too. I wonder what playing chess with President Coin would be like. I'd learn a lot on how her brain operates, but so will she on mine.

"I was back then," I reply, still in that neutral tone.

"Soldier Cadoret," she says exasperatedly.

"Look," my voice has become defensive, "we both know Katniss Everdeen is not ready to become the Mockingjay. Not without Peeta. It will take a lot of persuading for her to do that. Bringing me into the picture will set a bomb off her. The arena is inside her. All of us still have a piece of the arena. And since I'm from District 2, also known as the Capitol's lapdogs, she will refuse to operate with me."

Everything I say has reason behind it, but still, Coin asks the question I knew I'd get asked eventually. "Is it because she killed your friends?"

I look Coin directly in the eyes, not letting my mask falter. "Perhaps I still resent her a bit and now is not the time for me to be in close proximity to her."

"Let me remind you-"

"I know," I snap. "Thresh killed Clove and I'm glad when she finally killed Cato. But that does not excuse the fact that both my friends are dead because of her. One of them could have gone back home. My brother could have had his friend by his side. I don't care if it meant I'd never see him again, or if I died here. Quite frankly, I don't believe I deserve to be alive. I took a risky gamble and came out the winner. Now, well, now I don't know what to do with my life except move on."

We stare at each other for a long time. I feel the rage start to simmer down.

"Right now, I don't want anything to do with Katniss Everdeen or her family. If you can, change either mine or Hawthorne's schedule so that I don't have to see him," I say in a calmer tone.

Coin's expression remains the same, cold and calculated. "That, I can do, if you agree to cooperate with me," she says eventually.

"With you," I agree.