When I'm Gone

Chapter 3

The strangest part of watching your life after you die isn't looking at your dead self.  It's actually watching the reactions of everyone around you.

My parents were hysterical, which I get.

Vanessa didn't even bat an eye.  She just continued to Snapchat her friends as to how bored she was.  That bitch.

Mackenzie wouldn't leave my side, not even when the nurses tried to pull her off.  That made me happy, knowing how much she cared.

I had no idea how I was a ghost, or what I could do.  Maybe I could haunt Vanessa or something.  That would be so cool to possess her and make her Snapchat all her friends stupid stuff.

But I wouldn't do that.  I wouldn't sink to her level.  But what would I do?  I could go home, but that would just make me really sad.  I could go to school.  Yeah, that works.

But how would I get to school?

Suddenly, I was in the school.  I guess that was a perk of being dead.  Teleportation.  I was at the back of the classroom watching Ms. Arnolds go on and on about the economics of the 1900s in Europe or something like that.  This was the class I would've been in, if I was alive.  Everyone was there, except Mackenzie.

Suddenly, the door opened and Dr. Ballinger, the principle, entered.  He said something quietly to Ms. Arnolds and she gasped.

They were talking about me.

Dr. Ballinger faced the class.  "I just received a call from Audrey Mann's parents.  As you know, she was in the hospital because of the car crash.  We have just received word that she died.  I know she was in your class and I wanted to notify the senior class individually before we make the announcement to the school.  We will have a service tomorrow."

The class was silent.  No one knew what to say.

"Amanda, because you are class president, would you might giving a speech?"

"It would be an honor."

"Thank you."

He walked out and Ms. Arnolds faced the class.  "I think that will end our lesson for today.  Amanda, you can work on your speech.  If anyone would like to make a card to send to the Manns, I could get some paper from the art room."

"Could I have the class help me with my speech?" Amanda asked.  "I think it would be better if it came from all of us, not just me."

No, you just don't want to write it by yourself, I thought.  Amanda was always lazy, she just ran for class president for the college application boost.  And she won because she's popular.

"Does anyone have any stories of Audrey you would like to put in the speech?"

Bella stood up.  She was on the swim team and one of my friends.  "Audrey was a great teammate.  For swim last year, she would always head to the pool early and stay late to help her teammates with their technique.  Sometimes when I would head to the locker room to get changed right after school, she would already be there, swimming laps.  She was so determined to improve, and her energy was spread throughout the entire team.  The swim season, and the rest of our senior year won't be the same without her."

"Very well said, Bella," Ms. Arnolds added.

"Audrey was a team leader?" one of the boys, Andrew, said in surprise.  "Whenever I tried to talk to her, she would always be so rude to me.  She was sarcastic and seemed to think she was better than me."

"That's because you were a jerk to her since middle school," Meghan said.  "She used to be nice to you, but after 6 years of being bullied by you, she gave up on that."

"I think you should add that she was a rude jerk," Andrew insisted.

"I think you should shut up," Meghan said.  I was surprised.  Meghan was one of my friends, but she never really was that close to me.  "Audrey was nice, smart, athletic, and a great friend.  If you want to say she's a jerk, fine.  But you're wrong, and I will stand by my words."

That shut Andrew up.  The class continued with stories; some made me laugh, some made me cry.  All of them made me wish I was alive.

But if I was alive, I would never hear their true opinions.  I would never know what they really felt about me.  They should never share their stories.

But now, I could never reply.  I could just sit in the back of class and wish I was really there.