Some Lonely Feeling ✧ H.S. A.U.

Chapter 14;

I think it was nine or so blocks I had to walk. I looked to the sunny sky, tugging at Harry’s sweater falling low on my mid-thigh. It was funny; the shorts sticking out from the sweater. I resorted to holding onto the pants, letting the white shirt sag over my hand messily. I loosely held onto the clothes that slumped over onto my spare arm. Today seemed like a good day; the best day I had, had in a long time. It still didn’t feel right, but my mood had noticeably changed; I was much happier, definitely.

I, after a good hour or so, reached the Jade’s apartment building. By this point, I was weak at my knees, with very little motivation to walk further. I opened the doors, looking at the steps ahead of me, “Damn,” I whispered to myself. Rather upset, I forced myself up to the fourth floor, and down the long hall. I took a deep breath, knocking. I listened to her slow stomps coming to the door, “Hey!” I greeted enthusiastically at the sight of her face, “I wal-“

“Stop,” she snapped putting her left hand up slowly, gesturing me to stop talking, as she interrupted me. There soon was an awkward silence that began angering me, “Look, I’m sorry, I have a hangover.”

I eased my words out softly, “It’s fine,” I replied shrugging.

“Come on,” she said as I followed her in, “Who’s clothes are those?” she asked briskly going over to her couch. I began to wonder how long it had been exactly; how long it had been since I had been here. Her couch was white last time I saw it, and now there were noticeable stains from alcohol peeking out from under a red blanket. Not only that, but there also was a large distinct rip down the right side, and the white a clearly gone from white to a dark cream of some sort.

“Harry’s,” I mumbled, “Um, we went swimming and mine are, they’re wet.”

“Oh,” she murmured swishing the vodka in her cup around, “This is disgusting,” she said opening her window. She picked up her glass, dumping the liquid out onto the street, along with another glass sitting across from her. I began looking around more. How awful had things gotten here? I looked at her walls. The peach colored wallpaper was peeling from the top, and the one painting she had up was spotted with some stains. It also hung to the right, looking as if it was one small commotion from falling. Her ceiling fan was running as if it was about to fall, and it seemed everything here had gone from brand new to a million years old.

“Why would you throw it out onto the street?” I asked becoming abruptly concerned, “That’s more disgusting than old alcohol!” I snapped.

“It doesn’t hurt you any so why do you care?” she spat back calmly. I decided it was best to not reply. This was actually sad, so sad. Where had she gone? She wasn’t like this just a month ago. Was this how Harry felt about Ashley? Is this what happened to Ashley? I bet it was. Right before my eyes I was watching Jade ruin herself. Everything she could possibly have. She had gone from the average weight, to stick thin.  Her face was slightly caved in, and it was now that I was wondering what other drugs she was doing, “Hey did I tell you, I’m quitting school,” she broke in, breaking the slight silence.

“What? Why?” I asked quickly.

“I, um, I guess don’t want to worry about it anymore,” she said, “So, when it’s time to go back, I’m just not going to,” she smiled. Her teeth are disgusting too, I thought.

“Jade, I’m worried about you,” I replied reluctantly, “You’re hurting yourself,” I said watching her nudge over a liquor bottle to the other end of the coffee table. I then got a clearer view of the white powdery liquid spread across the table, along with a few pills.

“Damn it Claire,” she snapped, “This is not your life. It’s mine.”

“I’m just trying to-“