Pregnant In the Quell

Chapter Four

I nod and try to accept what he has said, but I can't help but feel an intense feeling of guilt that is eating me alive.

"I'm going to my house to get ready. You can say goodbye to your family while I'm in the shower. I just don't have the energy to go anywhere right now." I whisper to him as I travel to my mother's house for my last few hours of freedom.

***

I step into the shower and let the hot water run down my naked body. I rub my slightly swollen abdomen. It looks almost the same, but I look as if I've gained a few pounds. 

I slip out of the shower and dry my hair. I style my hair with a plain braid that swoops to the side. My outfit is a denim jump suit accessorized by a brown belt buckle. I wear my black combat boots.

I stare at myself in the mirror. I try to imagine a world where this baby could live happily.  Where there was no hunger games or Capitol. Just peace.

My thoughts are interrupted by Peeta standing in the door way.

"You look stunning," he says.

I look to the floor and blush slightly. I can never take a compliment.

***

Peeta and I walk silently to the reaping. It is at 2:00 sharp.

All of district 12 is to attend the reaping. If you don't show up, peace keepers will literally put you to your death.

Peeta and I walk towards the stage, where I see a bubbly Effie trinket standing in the middle of two bowls.

She is wearing an orange dress completely covered with butterflies. Her wig today is also orange.

I laugh for a moment, because Effie never fails to amuse me.

Before Peeta and I walk to our sides, he hugs me and gives me a soft kiss on the head. Making sure nobody could see from the angle we were at, he places his hand on my stomach and gives it a reassuring rub.

I walk to the girls side. I remembered that spot like it was yesterday. It's where I stood when my sister was reaped in the 74th hunger games, and I volunteered.

Effie gives her usual speech about the games and how it saves us and keeps us from going into war. In my opinion, it's a bunch of bullshit. But it's not my place to say anything like that. If I were to speak my mind, I'd be transformed into an avox, or killed.

I don't pay attention until I hear the words. "As always, Ladies first."

I don't understand why they're even having a reaping. Everyone knows it's me. Everyone knows that I won't come out of these games alive.

"Katniss Mellark."

I step towards Effie and stand next to her.

"And now, for the boys."

"Haymitch Abernathy."

"Oh my god," I think. "Peeta is going to live."

Before I can even react to who was chosen, Peeta has already volunteered.

***

The ride on the train is silent. I can't eat, because I feel so sick. My back has a sharp pain and my head is pounding.

Haymitch, being Haymitch has already commented on my weight.

"Well, Sweetheart. It looks like you've been packing on the pounds lately."

I try to keep my emotions in line, but of course I get so frustrated that I start to cry. Peeta comforts me, but I feel so stupid.