Recovery {H.S}*AU*

Silence

I felt so out of place, I didn't want to be at Harrys any longer but my car is still at the bar. I've been lying in the bed for the whole afternoon, avoiding Harry. I tried to make it seem like I wasn't mad or hurting but deep down I was. If he weren't drunk that night then why would he be stupid enough to invade my personal space?

I thought he hated me for dumping him, why would he want to have sex with me again? Earlier he took the effort to check up on me, I acted as if I was asleep. I'm afraid that he'll take this situation into an opportunity to be close again. What is worrying me the most about this problem is Tyler, and his thoughts.

Tyler is a co-worker of mine and we met a few weeks after Harry and I split. He's tall, blonde hair and blue eyes. He has this funny charm about himself that made me like him. You can say we're dating but I refer it to as a "Fling." I haven't informed him about Harry and I's past relationship.

I decided to get up from the bed, walk around in the big room and just think. I go onto the balcony to get some fresh air; I check my phone if Tyler contacted me earlier today but he hasn't called at all.

The sunset was starting, which reminded me that I pretty much haven't ate anything today. Usually when I'm hungover I don't have the appetite to eat. I did however want water so, I got up quietly, and without disturbance made my way to the kitchen hoping Harry wasn't there.

I took a glass from the cupboard to fill it up with water. "Hey," Harry says, startling me ending up spilling some water on the tile floor. "Sorry, um, are you okay?" He asked nervously.

I grabbed a cloth and started to dry the mess I made, "I was fine before you gave me a heart attack." I replied joking a little bit.

"You didn't come down for dinner, I'm only trying to look out for you." Harry says speculating every detail. What was he doing all this time? Standing outside the door?

"I know that, I wasn't hungry." I responded as I put the cloth back where I got it after I was done using it. I drank the water, which made me feel so much better. Harry kept staring at me, not breaking his glance, making me feel uncomfortable. "Why do you keep looking at me like that? You're freaking me out," I added on taking another big gulp of water.

"I'm studying you. Rosalie you've changed, I can feel it," He assumes. I place the glass down, rolling my eyes at annoyance. On any given day I could be easily talked to but on a day where I'm tired and hungover, I'm not in the mood to talk.

"It's been a year, Harry. What do you expect? I change all the time; I'm new everyday. I'm not the same girl you fell in love with at In-N-Out burger," I fought back. Harry was being ridiculous; him out of anyone should really know my moods.

Harry took a moment before responding; I hope I didn't offend him that wasn't my intentions. "Honestly Rosie? I'm not asking for a fight, I wanted to catch up with you and have a real conversation," Harry said rising is voice, this happens every time.

"Just take me back to my car, I want to leave." I don't want to be here anymore, I definitely don't want to be around him anymore. I felt that lump in my throat when I want to cry but I won't let him be satisfied with the fact that yes, what he did hurt my feelings. What does he even want from me?

Harry's face tensed, not saying what was on his mind. He aggressively took his keys and I follow him cautiously. I opened up the passengers' side door and got in. He pulled out of the driveway and made our way to the bar to retrieve my car.

The car was silent for the rest of the ride. The only thing making noise was the sound of music playing off Harrys phone in his car, slow songs sung by James Bay. I know Harry really connects to this singer because he's told me before that his songs remind him of us. On the rare occasions when I'd miss Harry I'd listen to James Bay songs to bring him back for a little while.

As we pulled up to the bar 15 minutes later, I got out Harrys car without a goodbye. It's been a year since I've seen Harry but I'm quite sure I won't see him for another one.

He drove off and I'm now searching where my car is. As always it didn't take me long to find it, I drive a blue mini cooper. I thought since I'm small that this car was perfect for me and I truly love it. As I walk by the bar, I get a sickening feeling in my stomach. It was from being so drunk last night but mostly it was the memories of last night. I don't remember too much, I can only recall when I first arrive at the bar feeling upset.

I got to my car and I could feel the tears forming in my eyes. I broke down into sobs, it's too much for me to handle but I couldn't show him that. Clearly my life isn't as good as I thought it was, I'm just waiting for him to screw me over once again, like he always does.

My hands keep shaking, my heart won't stop racing. I start my car and drive to my home in Santa Monica. I rolled the windows down letting the cool air dry my tears. I blast the radio to whatever the hell is playing so I can forget for a few seconds.

This isn't fair to me, other one-night stands wouldn't be a big deal but this is different. Harry wasn't drunk and he sure as hell knew what was going on, he let his pervy mind take over to please himself. I'm sickened by the fact that he didn't respect me, I saw him in a new light. My drunken self probably wanted him to kiss me and pretend as if we were still a couple, so I can't really blame him when I want to.

Our biggest fight we ever had was when we went to England to visit his family. That whole trip was a disaster, and it started with me having a panic attack about flying, it was my first time. But I have to remember how caring and thoughtful Harry was through that situation; although he didn't know what to do, he did it amazingly and I'm forever grateful for him, the Harry I know.