We can fix it [Larry Stylinson] **ON HOLD**

Chapter Two - Dealing with pain

Hiii! Thanks if you read my story! Means a lot! :) Sorry again for my grammar.. Anyway, enjoy!

----------

The lesson continues normally. I mean, I think it does, because I can't listen to a word my teacher says. Aaron keeps on looking at me from time to time, but I try to avoid his eyes. I have never actually told someone about me singing. I don't even know if I'm good or anything. All I know is that, when I'm alone, I start singing. And then it all just goes away. The pain, the sadness... all of it!

I keep on staring to the clock, when i suddenly hear someone calling my name.

"Mr. Styles, if you don't mind me interrupting you, can you please answer the question I've just asked?"

"Urm...". Smart answer, I know. I turn to see Aaron, but he can't help me. What was he talking about? I see something written on the board. I try to read something, but then the inevitable happens...

"Maybe you'd like to pay a visit to our headmaster."

What the hell is wrong with him? He used to be such a nice teacher! But, what can I do? I have been sent to the headmaster once before, by my history teacher because she caught me eating. Well, fuck you, I'm hungry.

In two minutes I find myself in front of the office. I bite my lip, and then go inside. The man is sitting in his comfortable armchair. He has a coffee cup on the corner of the table, which he haven't even touched. He is reading something in a paper, while clearing his throat.

"Harry Styles. Well, that's a surprise. What brings you here today?"

"Well,". I can't say more because he interrupts me.

"Oh, I already know. But let me ask you a question, what were you thinking about? Because it's not everyday when Harry is not paying attention in a class."

"I just.. I was just.." I can't tell him what I was really thinking about. His my headmaster, not my BFF.

"Were you thinking about that TV show? What is it called... 'X Factor'?"

"How do you...?"

"Don't bother. I know everything that happens in this school. Now, tell me. Do you seriously think of joining? Because I've never heard you singing."

I don't know what to answer. It's like I am two different people.. the usual boy who hopes to make a decent career and the guy who dreams to sing on Madison Square Garden next to Madonna! I start to stutter, not knowing what to say.

"It's okay, boy. You know.." he says as he leans in "..that talent show of ours is coming soon. Maybe you can try something different this year." He then nods so that I can get out.

I go out of the office really quick and guess who was outside. Ryan.

"Hello, faggot. Nice to see you." He then does something that surprise me. He spits me. He literally spits me. "You think you can sing, curly? Maybe you can show us some!". I can hardly say something when i feel his fist on my face. I start to bleed. Oh, gosh, blood! How am i supposed to hide this from my mum?

After a few seconds i hear Aaron. He gives me a hand to stand up. I can see the anger in his eyes. This kind of makes me feel a bit better. Knowing that someone actually cares. However, I don't wait for him. I start running towards my house the second i feel able to. I still have 3 more courses until the day is over, but I can't stay in that school another second. 

-------------

I'm home. In my room. Alone. Scared. Sad. Nothing would seem different from how my life is, but now I feel like it was too much. I can't handle this anymore. This life shit. I take a knife. My hands are shaking so bad; I need someone to stop me. Why isn't anybody here?? The tears come streaming down my face. I make a first cut. Then another one. Then another one. I don't stop until I see blood coming out of each of them. This blood is a sign that shows me that I'm alive. Alive.. but miserable.

I find myself lying on the floor, covered in blood. I just stare at the cuts. I'm no longer holding the knife. The only feeling I have right now is pain, anger, sadness. But i have to stop. Stop thinking. I gotta stand up, go to work and forget. But how could someone forget this? 

-----------

"Sir, can you please give me a black bread." I look down to see a young girl, around five. Her blonde hair cover her white face. I can barely see those big green eyes under her bangs.

"Urm, yeah sure." I put a bread in a nice bag and hand it to her. When my hand is in the air, one of my cut is showing. I take my arm back as soon as I can, but not soon enough. The girl had already seen it. She is staring at me. Just staring, not making a sound. I decide to break the silence.

"That'd be.. £1.37.."

The girl looks for the money in her bag. She puts it on a table and leaves. For the first time, i felt like cutting was a bad choice. Like I did something wrong. Really wrong. What the hell was I thinking? 

It's 5:43 PM. No one's in the bakery right now, so I take my headphones off my pocket. I go through a long playlist and then stop at 'Fix you" by Coldplay. I don't even notice that I've been singing it even since I pressed play. I guess I just got lost among the lyrics. Yeah, it's a bit better now. It's like music makes a wall between me and reality and that feels good.

I didn't realise. Ohh, why didn't I see him before? It was Aaron, standing right in front of me. I've never seen him so surprised. His eyes were fixing me. It's weird, but the first thing that got into my mind wasn't embarrassment.. no.. it was relief.