Project X ✔ [O L D V E R S I O N]

+ chapter twenty-eight +

"Good afternoon, General," Chandler smiled, helping Kelly walk down the hall. She looked like her child was giving her hell, but she still managed to smile and glance at her growing stomach with loving eyes.

Xander forced a twitch of his lips and quietly said, "Good afternoon." He continued his journey down the hospital corridors, silently counting the 312 steps he needed to take in order to reach his beloved's room.

He had counted them in order to occupy his mind whenever he visited her and at first it worked, but now the numbers seemed to fly aimlessly around his head. He did it more out of habit than trying to busy his mind with something other than her shrieks.

When he finally reached room 72, he hesitated in front of the door and forced himself to enter. Every day was the same routine; he had to pep talk himself into entering the room or he would turn and walk away.

The soft sound of the beeping machines filled the room, accompanied by the oxygen mask that was placed over her mouth. Although she hadn't woken since the emergency procedure Dr. Naveer had to carry out, she looked healthier than that day.

She was still pale, but the colour was slowly returning to her body and she was cleaned. Her girlfriends took turns washing her for Xander only permitted them to see her naked. He didn't even allow himself to touch her, for he had hurt her; he didn't deserve to lay a finger on her body.

But he touched her face and hands nonetheless.

He had to remind himself that she was still there and he could only do that by caressing her hands and falling asleep on the chair that was pulled up to the side of her bed.

Xander took a deep breath, pushing the chair up next to her and slowly sat down. He let out a shuddered breath as his body finally reminded him of all his exhaustion and he hesitantly lifted her hand from the bed to place it over his.

With his free hand, he closed her fingers around his hand and then breathed out. Her touch was cold, but it brought him a sense of warmth that spread out through his body and filled the growing void in his heart.

It had been ten long days without seeing her beautiful green eyes or hearing her melodious laugh. He was slowly easing into insanity because it was the only way he could see and hear what he missed the most.

Alexa no longer smelled of her favourite lemon-scented shampoo. She smelled of ivory soap and crisp hospital sheets.

It wasn't a bad smell, unlike human hospitals; the XISC didn't smell like cleaning detergents. According to the doctors, those smells did not help a patient recuperate; floral and sweet scents would relax and have positive effects.

"Hi," His throat burned with emotion as all of the shrieks she had released replayed in his mind like a catchy soundtrack, "mielle." He was quiet for a couple of seconds, not knowing what to say even though he had plenty of things to speak about.

For ten days it was always the same thing. The words he desperately needed to get out of his chest, got caught in his throat and he was unable to say them out loud.

"How I miss you," he managed to whisper, "even with all the languages in the world combined, there are not enough words to express how much I miss you. I am so sorry for what I did, but I do not think that I could have been sane enough to wake up without you for the rest of my life. These past couple of days have been torturous and I would give my life in order to hear your voice one more time."

Xander pressed his face against her arm, finding solace with just touching her. It was truly pathetic.

"I managed to get the females back to their partners," he began quietly; "they will be much safer in the island. The President also allowed us to stay for as long as our people desire and the choice will be up to you. If your feelings for me have not changed after what I have done, I will stay by your side and try to make up for the pain that I have caused you."