Me, Myself & I (Catnipz)

A particular glance

"I never said it didn't matter," she said, still not looking at me.

Rejected once again.

"I'll go get a bottle of water..." I stood up. "Do you want anything?" I asked timidly.

"No, thank you," she said and pulled out a wad of bills from her pants pocket, extending her arm toward me to take the money. "What do you want?" I asked, and she declined again.

"For yourself..."

"I don't need anything, Kim," I turned around and headed down the stairs. It hurt when Minji reacted like that. But what did I expect? For her to say, I'm only interested in you too? Knowing that Minji is colder than an iceberg.

I reached the line, and there was only one person ahead: Hanni. She paid and turned around, unfortunately catching sight of me.

"Haerin," she said in a playful tone disguised as serious. "How are you?"

"Fine," I replied coldly and asked for the bottle of water, taking out the exact change to pay for it along with a few candies.

"That's good," she smiled. "You know, I wanted to talk to you." I rolled my eyes. "It'll be quick, come on." She took my arm and walked to the back of the campus store. There was no one there.

"What is it about?" I asked irritably.

"It's about your bet with Danielle," she said seriously.

"Look..." I interrupted her. "That's none of your business, so stay out of it."

"It does concern me because it involves my girlfriend," she raised her voice. "And my girlfriend's best friend." I lowered my gaze and then raised it again. "You'll probably ignore what I'm about to say, but I ask you not to." She sighed. "What Danielle and you did was stupid..."

"And who the hell do you think you are to..."

"You're playing with someone," she ignored my interruption. "Someone who seems to interest you, and Minji is interested in you," she gestured with her hands. "And you can't deny it. I don't know you, but Danielle has told me a lot about you, and just by seeing you, it's easy to see what you feel for her."

"You don't know anything..."

"Neither do you," she replied in the same aggressive manner I had used. "If you did, you'd know that with that 'game,' more than one person gets hurt—Minji, Sihyun, Jongin, me... Haerin, I tried from the beginning to get close to you and become friends..."

"I don't need friends," I said angrily. "So don't bother trying to get close to me."

"You do need them. Your loneliness is palpable miles away, and despite all the effort you put into camouflaging it with your 'heavy personality,' you don't succeed," she shook her head. "Let people get close to you and earn your affection." I turned away. "If you need anything, you have a friend here..."

I climbed the stairs to the top where Minji was still sitting, but she covered her face with both hands.

"Don't cry anymore, I'm back," I sat next to her. She let me see her face; obviously, she wasn't crying.

"I thought you were mad..."

"What?" I laughed ironically. "Me? Angry? Because I told you I liked you once again and was rejected once again?" I laughed again. "Of course not, you can't trample on me anymore, Minji."

She chuckled and shook her head again. Was that all she could do?

"Sweet?" I asked, pulling out four candies wrapped in shiny red paper from my shorts pocket.

"No, thanks," she replied, and I laughed stupidly.

"See? If being rejected were a sport, I'd win gold."

"You should suggest it for the next Olympics," sarcastic!

"Maybe I will," I said, putting one of the candies in my mouth.

The game was halfway through, and our team was getting slaughtered.

"I told you they'd lose without me," she said confidently, not taking her eyes off the game.

"Conceited," I said, coughing to cover up what I had said.

It was starting to get cold, and I was freezing; I wanted to go home. It had been a lousy night. Today I was "put in my place" by Hanni, and once again rejected by Minji, who first tells me she likes me and then ignores me.

I pulled my legs up onto the stands and hugged my knees, hiding half my face in them to avoid the cold air hitting me directly. I shrank back when I felt something on my shoulders. It was Minji's jacket.

"Do you want to go?" she asked, and I shook my head, wrapping myself tightly in the jacket that didn't warm me at all. She wanted to watch the game, and it was amusing to see the players' frustrated faces, especially Eunchae's.

"Come here," she wrapped her arms around me, which I infinitely appreciated. It really warmed me up.

"I didn't ignore you, and I didn't reject you," she said, looking me in the eyes. "I was just... surprised, and I didn't know the right way to respond to you." She brushed a strand of hair from my face. "This is hard," she bit her lower lip.

"It's not hard, Minji. It's not hard for me to say 'I love you,'" I closed my eyes. Damn it! I didn't say that! I couldn't have said that! "And that's even easier to respond to—'I don't' or 'I do too,'" I opened my eyes, looking at her for her response, but once again, there was none.

Couldn't she just say "I don't" and end all of this? I removed her arms from me, then the jacket, and left it on the stands.

"Haerin," she said, and I turned, but she only looked at me apologetically, and once again, silence took hold of her.

Damn it, my eyes were welling up. No, I wasn't going to cry over this... I wasn't going to cry over her. Here I was feeling like the worst person in the world, and she was playing games with me too.

I ran down the stairs and then along the long hallway to the exit, but I collided with someone so strongly that I fell to the ground.

"Haerin! Are you crazy?" Danielle asked, laughing.

"A little..." I forced a laugh. "Danielle, I lost. I'm backing out of the bet," I raised my gaze.

"What happened? Did you get hurt? What did she do to you?" she asked alarmed and angry, seeing a tear running down my cheek.

"Nothing, nothing happened. I didn't get hurt, it's just that she doesn't deserve for me to play games like this with her... I'm going home," I said quickly and kissed her cheek before running off once again.

Author's note:

Hello! I hope you are enjoying this story. I just wanted to say that I'm grateful for those who are supporting this story with your votes and nice comments. But for those who are always asking for more, I just want them to be patient. I'm in college, studying Computer Engineering and I have a life, I cannot update a lot. And even when I update more than 5 chapters in a row, they ask for more. So please, just be patient.

thanks.