Slow It Down

Part 4 •REWRITTEN•

Fuck me.

Then I saw her eyes, wide with uncertainty as they scanned the room. I froze in place when those big, green eyes landed on mine. She didn't see me—not really. She scanned the room with apprehension, then turned toward her friend, her long brunette hair swishing behind her, settling in loose waves over her back.

She looked completely different. And yet, exactly the same. I shouldn't have been looking at her like this.

She's Kayce's little sister. She's off-limits. She doesn't exist to you, Jackson.

Grinding my teeth, I shoved down whatever the hell that feeling was and I wrenched my gaze away, dragging a hand through my hair, forcing my thoughts somewhere else. What the fuck was she even doing here? How was she at the same college party as me, hours away from our hometown?

She looked out of place, and for a second, it almost made me laugh—Lilah, at a party like this? But then I caught the flicker of hesitation in her eyes, the way her shoulders tensed, and I realized she was nervous. She should've been, based on several guys glancing over like she was the next target. That unease sat heavy in my chest, and I hated the way I felt my guard go up.

Did Kayce even realize?

No. Not my problem. I wasn't doing this shit.

I took a sip of my drink, forcing myself to stop looking at her. She wasn't my problem. She was my best friend's little sister. And I already had too much shit on my plate to add her to it.

I needed a drink. Something stronger than the beer in my hand. I downed the rest of my drink and turned, deciding I would just leave the room entirely. I had no reason to be thinking about her. No reason to feel anything. I had spent the last four years avoiding her for a reason. She was Kayce's sister. That's all she was. I needed to get out of here, away from her.

But I didn't leave. I didn't get a drink, and I didn't find some girl to fuck in one of the available rooms or to take home.

Instead, I leaned against the railing upstairs, sipping my water, watching her from a distance. Not like a creep, I told myself. I was just keeping an eye on her. I didn't mean to end up here. It just fucking happened. That was the excuse I gave myself, anyway.

I told myself it's just curiosity. That I was just surprised to see her, that I wasn't worried, that I didn't care. But that was bullshit. Because the longer I stood here, the more my stomach twisted with a feeling I didn't like. I could already see guys watching her—hungry fucking looks, some not even trying to hide it. None of them knew who she is. None of them knew she wasn't the type of girl who should be here.

Kayce was stupid to bring her here. He either didn't realize or didn't want to acknowledge the fact that guys at these parties weren't the type to play nice. Lilah may look different now, but within a few minutes, I could tell she was still too soft and innocent to be in a place like this. And she didn't even have a drink in her hand or alcohol in her system to cause her to have her guard down.

At least, not yet.

And that's what made my shoulders stiffen when she followed Natalie to the kitchen for what had to be the third time tonight. I leaned against the railing, barely aware of the way I clenched my jaw when I saw her return with a red solo cup in her hand. My stomach sunk. She hesitated at first, but then she took a sip, her painted lips wrapping around the rim of the plastic cup.

Fuck.

I watched as she swallowed, then took another eager sip, and something settled in my chest that I didn't want to name. I knew I had no right to feel protective over her. But I also knew what guys were like at these parties. I had seen it. I had been one of them.