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Dear Cecily,
Ketterdam is just as bad as I remember from the first time we were here. At least I don't feel the urge to jump out my apartment window anymore. I guess I can thank you for that. As much as I hate to admit it, I have to acknowledge Kaz for it as well. Even though I'm living here for free, I've been given a job and tasks to complete throughout the day. At night, I work at the Crow Club and rat out card counters. It's quite boring, but Jesper and the new bartender make the shifts go by faster.
In the morning, I have to walk down to Fifth Harbor with Kaz. He does a lot of business with the sailors that come in. I don't know why he brings me, but I don't mind, I suppose. We don't talk most days, which might be for the best. When we do, it's just to fight, and I can't fathom why. He got what he wanted. It can't be because Kaz figured out what I am — what we are. He doesn't seem to care that I'm not a human. He doesn't seem to care about me at all, just that I make myself useful to him.
I don't think I'll ever be happy here, Cecily, and I can't bring myself to take off Mama's ring. I'm not getting married, but it still feels like a betrayal to Killian. And I hate it here. The Unseelie Court is unruly, but not like this. I cannot say that it's worse, just different. But it's the kind of difference that I haven't gotten used to in these two months.
It doesn't feel like spring yet, and I miss the flower garden at home. I hope Papa got the honeysuckles this time instead of mistaking them with belladonna again. Did you get the daffodils this year? I know how much you love them. I got a bundle of them from a flower shop in East Stave for my room because they remind me of you. Remember how we said we'd open one in Istamere someday? Neither of us was ever fit for the Unseelie Court, no matter how much we try.
I don't know when I'll be home. If I could convince Kaz, perhaps I could celebrate Saoirse's birthday and Ostara with all of you. We could all try to live normally now that Papa is adamant about fixing our reputation. It will be Adora's first season out on the Court. I'm sure Papa has already talked to you about all of that business. The Fates always have a plan—it's whether or not they decide to share it with you.
I love you, Cece. I know I don't say it enough. Please write back soon.
I miss you all dearly,
Eulalie
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Anna's notes.
i shouldn't have to say this, but apparently, it's not common fucking sense. DON'T STEAL ANY OF THE GRAPHICS. most of them are made by me. some are made by @sawyerfilms. if i see any of them used in any place without permission, i will make your life a living hell.
