Dalaric

Ten: "𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣'𝙩."

I'm not sure I can even handle school right now. I guess I'll have to email my essay at the café.

I play with a loose string on my shirt as the first knock sounds. I clench my eyes as I lean back onto the wall, a hand over my mouth to muffle my sounds of calling him out.

The second knock sounds. It's daunting, how he's right outside the door but so far away.

"Mayella. Open." His groggy voice calls out.

I'm so selfish because I'm wasting his time. But I can't text him, who knows if Landon or Joshua are watching my every move. I hate that I don't want to risk it.

I get up and pad softly towards the gate to my happiness. Sudden images make me halt in my steps. Images of Landon doing worse things to me. Images of Joshua muffling my screams and hurting more than my wrist.

I'm selfish.

I wait and wait, until I hear booted steps make their way down the building stairs. I turned my phone off four hours ago, he definitely thinks I'm ignoring him. There's no point in apologizing, he already hates me.

I'm selfish.

The next seven hours are spent either asleep or listening to sad rock songs. I put on some leggings to go with my oversized t-shirt and make my way to the café, ignoring the calls of my landlord by covering my ears.

My heart palpates as I look around the streets paranoid that they are somewhere here, watching me. Much to my fortune, I don't spot anything.

"There's my girl! We missed you at the café yesterday." Jim frowns exaggeratedly at the fact that I didn't have a shift yesterday.

He looks around the café first before leaning in further, his arms now wide open.

"The rest of the workers are so annoying, it was hell." I giggle in response to his antics.

Jim can always make me laugh. The giggles die down when he bear hugs me, his arms pressing tightly on my shoulders.

I bite my lip, drawing out blood so I don't scream in agony. He lets me go, a grin on his happy face and I can't help but smile back at him, rather weakly.

I can't let people be sad because of my own sadness.

After changing into my work clothes, I feel slightly better. It feels normal. Just a normal day, work after school.

Except only he isn't here. I also want wendy's.

Shaking my head to get rid of those pessimistic thoughts, I smile at my first customer.

Aw, babies! There are triplets in the couple's arms. I reach over to pinch one of their cheeks after asking for permission and giggle along with them.

"I love chubby babies." I tell the couple, who seem to be newly wed.

The mother frowns, "They're not fat."

Oops.

"No-um, I uh-meant that- did you want the vanilla cupcake with the coffee to go?" I try to change the subject with a nervous smile at it works.