Cold.
Pearl felt cold.
Pearl had never felt cold before.
Gems usually weren't affected by non-lethal tempratures, aren't bothered by them.
But all Pearl felt these days, was cold.
Amethyst was always so warm.
She would wrap her arms around her and feel it.
Warm in her form.
Warm in her theoretical heart.
Her whole being would fill with this indescribable warmth.
And when they fused, when they became Opal, Pearl was surrounded by the warmth.
Like she was wrapped in this warm soft blanket.
When Amethyst's warmth became part of her, it made her feel like a whole different person.
Amethyst was also so touchy, so clingy ( metaphorically and litterally).
If Pearl was simply sitting down, Amethyst would snuggle up against her, or lay her head in Pearl's lap and just gaze into her eyes.
They would hold hands while on missions, cuddle as Amethyst slept, usually fusing during battles, give eachother random kisses, and through all of these actions Pearl felt Amethyst's warmth.
And on nights when they were alone, when Steven was asleep and they were hidden away in one of their rooms, when they were lost in eacthother, the warmth would burn through her.
It would burn through each of them in such an indescribably vital way.
And after, Pearl would wrap blankets around them and hold onto her, onto the warmth, until Amethyst pried her arms away.
Every moment Pearl was with Amethyst she was warm.
She can still feel it now, radiating in her memories, just out of reach.
And every time she thought about that warmth, she got colder, and colder.
She would shake and shiver, and cry silent tears as she thought about Amethyst.
As she thought about everything in her life that had burned out.
Amethyst was burning.
Burning inside.
She screamed and balled fists into her own hair.
She would claw at the ground and snarl at the sky.
It felt like fire was burning her from the inside out.
Pearl was always so calming and cool.
When Amethyst was losing herself all it took was Pearl to be there, to look into her eyes.
And suddenly everything melted away.
She had clung onto Pearl for dear life, litterally wrapping around her every second she could.
And Pearl would always smile that smile that made everything feel ok.
She would run her fingers through her hair and hold her close.
She would whisper sweet everythings into her ear.
She would kiss her softly and sweetly untill everything else faded away.
With Pearl gone, Amethyst was unrecognizable, even to herself.
She was burning away, peice by peice.
And she felt every inch of it.
And everytime she thought about Pearl, about the love of her life, the fire burned hotter.
Pearl stopped talking to people, aside from Garnet and Steven.
She stopped doing things.
She would simply go into Amethyst's room and lay there.
She wouldn't tidy, or look for anything.
Just lay there with tears streaming down her face.
Amethyst wandered around the kindergarten, screaming and crying and destroying everything in her path.
She didn't care about anything anymore.
She wanted it all to burn.
And in her darkest moments, she wanted to burn too.
Without eachother they both susceeded into extremis.
---
Everyone saw Amethyst get shattered.
Pearl saw it.
And when the peices disapeared, Pearl lost her mind.
Amethyst replayed what should have been her final moments over and over in her head.
Pearl's spear.
Pearl's face.
Her gem.
Pearl wrestled with what she understood to be her love's demise,
while Amethyst processed what she perceived as her murder by the hands of the most important thing in her life.
