𝐀𝐃𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍

"—but I'll have to endure more. Suffer more," Y/n interrupted sharply, before he coughed, his voice a horrible, rattling sound. And to his horror, he saw that emerging from his mouth had been blood—"did you know the butler was going to poison me?"

"How could I foresee this?" Andrei murmured gently, and Y/n was surprised that despite his own angry tone, Andrei was not angry at him, or the slightest bit irked. In fact, he seemed calm, controlled, and...

Red was staining Andrei's fingers and his coat. No—no—not just that, but there was so much of it. In his confusion, Y/n hadn't realized just how vibrantly crimson and violent everything was. A fine cascade of blood hit the floor with an echoing splat, and Andrei only glanced down.

"I rushed to see you," he smiled, "I didn't have time to clean myself of such a horrid man's blood, you see."

The pulsating, ferocious sight pressed and throbbed in Y/n's throat. He could feel bile rising up in his tattered throat, horror creeping up in his bones, pushing through his chest and making his skin crawl—"you...you killed him, obviously. Didn't you? That's why you're so calm."

"Torture, Moy Sladkiy. I tortured him first to ensure he could go through ten times the amount of the suffering you went through. You can read the statistic that the human body holds twenty-five feet of intestines: it was painstaking work, to have cut through all that. His skin slid off easily enough, and his screams..." Andrei pressed a kiss onto Y/n's now cold forehead, "you would have loved to hear them. His mistakes could not be rectified, and he has sufficiently paid for his crimes."

Y/n immediately jolted upright, his fingers clenching around the sheets in attempt to stop himself from feeling over.

No one. No one deserved that: yes, the poison had been horrible, painful—but to hear Andrei say all of that so casually like it was nothing, Y/n felt the innate desire once again to flee: he was in a predator's den.

To make matters worse, Andrei was looking at him expectantly, pleased. For what? Did he expect Y/n to praise him for "returning" the deed, for giving him justice? Were his morals so corrupt and warped that he truly believed in an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth? Yet he hadnt' just ripped the tooth out—he has ripped the skin, the organs, the...

"Why would you even do that?" Y/n made a strangled sound, "you—"

No, if Andrei had been truly as monstrous in the past as now, now Y/n really wondered how they had become friends. How they had been so close to the point of this—to the point of obsession. Deep, dark obsession.

"Why?" Andrei laughed softly, "I promised you last time. I would get rid of anyone that ever hurt you. What you are to me..." Fingers grazed his throat, skimming over lightly and considerately, "I could not ever hope to explain. You saved me when I was at my lowest, my darkest: back when I was even haunted by numerous thoughts to kill myself. And all these years of searching for you, I had to carry on, and ache with this feeling of hollowness only you could ever hope to fill. You have done this to me, Y/n. You have rendered me in such a state."

Y/n would not have spoken even if he could have spoken. It was impossible to find words that defined what he felt now. Pained, yes, horrified, with deeply unsettling feelings of ambivalence, conflict, torn between decisions. The itch to run away remained, yet now he felt more mellow, more inclined to listen. The words in his dying throat died along with his hostile feelings: yet his strong uncomfort remained.

"You will search for me in another person."

"None would ever come close to you."

Andrei leaned back and sighed. "...I will not push you, Y/n. Because I know that this is confusing to you. But when you get your memories back..." Andrei's voice lowered. "There will be no reason for you to ever look so horrified. What I've done might be atrocious to you. But for me—it is nothing. And these hands of mine that kill and annihilate, they will never touch you with nothing but gentleness and tenderness. You are free to push me away, to hurt me—but I pray that you never leave me."