stop and stare

12

The 9th of July couldn't have come around faster. Finally, it was my home race at Silverstone this weekend, and the high I was on was evident through my performance. I qualified on pole and came first in all three practices.

"Radio check Max," I hear through my helmet as I sit in the cockpit of my car.

"Loud and clear boss," I say to the pit wall.

"Let's have a nice and clean race today, and get that home win for you."

"You read my mind. We've got this team."

The grid is cleared and we start the formation lap. I weave through the straights to get my tyre temperature up and before I know it, we're back at the grid and I happily place my car at the front. This is one of my favourite parts of the race. I like to think of it as the calm before the storm. Each one of the little red lights illuminates the start line and I take on a last deep breath before they all go out my head is forced against the back of my seat as the acceleration pushes me so far back that I wonder why I ever questioned the hours of neck training I have done.

***

"Overall a good result from you Charles. We're happy with P1." Fred says to Charles in our race debrief. He turns to me, "Max, we're so sorry. We had no idea why the power unit in the car went, as there were no signs as to why it could have all weekend. The car and the team disappointed you and we are sorry."

I smile softly at him as I say, "It is what it is Fred. We did what we could with what was available to us. I'm thankful for the team's efforts regardless of the DNF. After all, all good things must come to an end."

Shortly after, the briefing is wrapped up and we're free to go. I walk on ahead to avoid having to stay with the team and the disappointed looks surrounding the paddock. Charles runs to keep up with me and says, "Hey, um- I won't be able to come over tonight as Joris wants to hang out, but I'll text you?"

"Uh, yeah sure, see you later," I smile and tell him. He walks off in front of me to hide how he grabbed my hand, to say goodbye, from the cameras.

***

"He just seems off, I don't know how to explain it," Ell says to me, curled up on my sofa with a glass of wine in hand.

"What's different about him?" I ask her.

"He hardly ever messages me anymore, I haven't been to a race since Monaco, and I just figured that with this being his home race he would want his girlfriend there to support him..." She explains to me and I see the tears she's desperately trying to hold back.

"It is a little strange, especially as he has had you at nearly every race this season..." I say to her before adding, "Why don't you call or text him about it? See if he can try to put some time aside and see you?"

"Let me show you what happens when I call him." She says and I can hear her mumble afterwards, "If he decides to pick up..."

She grabs her phone, unlocks it, and calls Lando. It rings and rings and rings and just as we both thought he wasn't going to pick up, he answers.

Hey Ell.

"Hey Lan, what you up to?"

Just doing some training for the GP this weekend, what about you?

"Oh, not much... Just quickly though,"

Yeah, what's up?

"Is there any time after this GP to see each other? I miss you and it feels like it's been ages..."

Uhmm... One second-

We can hear him moving about over the phone and I give Ell a confused look which she returns.