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It takes me a couple minutes to think through whether or no I want to knock on his door, or to just walk away

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

It takes me a couple minutes to think through whether or no I want to knock on his door, or to just walk away. But the want to know why he has been acting the way he has keeps me where I am stood and persuades me to knock. I can hear him shuffling around inside and eventual footsteps approach the door. It opens and Charles looks at me with a twinge of surprise on his face, as if he hadn't expected me to actually turn up. To be honest, neither did I.

"Hey, come on in," he says and moves out of the way for me to walk in.

I mumble a thanks at him and take off my shoes. I take a look around at the familiar hallway that leads to his kitchen and living room. The two doors on the right are his bathroom and laundry cupboard which are parallel to two doors on the left which are his bedroom and home gym. The only thing that has seemed to change since I was last here is the fact that there isn't any of my stuff around. The little gold tray by the door isn't there anymore. My shoes aren't messily put beside his and my photos of us aren't on the walls anymore.

The only thing that's changed is us.

I swallow and take a deep breath before walking down the hallway to the kitchen. I take a seat by the table and Charles offers me a drink.

"Just a hot chocolate will do," I say to him. He's the only person who could make it like my Mum did before she passed.

I sit there in silence as I watch him making my drink. His hair is messy, like he hasn't been able to sleep, and his black jumper and loose pyjama bottoms sit on him lazily. I get a sense of déjà but as he hands me the mug. He remembered to add the cream and only the pink marshmallows. I stare at the cup for a second before looking up at him. We just stay there for a while, scanning the situation we're in and trying to figure out what the other is thinking.

"What are we doing Charles?" I ask him quietly, almost as a whisper, and look down at my mug.

I hear him take a deep breath and wait for his response. "I don't know Scarlet... I really don't know." He whispers back at me and I can hear the lump in his throat as he talks to me.

I take a few minutes of silence before I ask my next question, "Why did you race me like that?"

He somehow manages to go even more still than he was. He turns away from me and starts to tidy the counters up. "That's just racing, there's nothing else to it,"

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